Learning to love again
by stroumfita
Summary: The story starts from ep. 1x10. Stefan goes through with his plan to get out of MF, and he leaves a devastated Elena behind. What will happen when she'll slowly start discovering secrets about her life, about her own identity? With Damon still in town, will certain truths bring them closer, or further apart?
1. Preface

**Learning To Love Again**

Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV show)

Rating: M

Genre: Romance/ Supernatural

Pairing: Damon/ Elena

Summary: The story starts from ep. 1x10. Stefan goes through with his plan to get out of MF, and he leaves a devastated Elena behind. What will happen when she'll slowly start discovering secrets about her life, about her own identity? With Damon still in town, will certain truths bring them closer, or further apart?

Hey, there!

After a lot of thought on the matter, I finally decided to put LTLA through a major editing process.

The plotlines are **not** going to change, even though there are changes in specific scenes throughout the story.

My advice is that you re-read all of the story, regardless of whether you had read the old version, or not. I promise this one is better, it flows better, it's just better! Okay? Trust me!

Anyway, on more practical issues…. Updates will be weekly! And in case anyone is wondering, the story has in total 29-31 chapters.

I hope to hear from you!

P.S. A big 'thank you' goes to my awesome beta Grace4Delena .

You can follow me on twitter: ts_eirini


	2. The turning point

**Disclaimer: I don't own TVD, even though I'd love to!**

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><p>"No," I said firmly, as I stepped out of the car, the door banging loudly behind me "you don't get to make that decision for me. If you're going to walk away, it's for you, because I know what I want. Stefan, I love you." At first, neither one of us moved, or spoke, and when I saw him turning around, I felt relief washing over me. His words, however, caught me off guard "Goodbye, Elena," he breathed, disappearing into the woods with wide strides.<p>

I remained still, staring at the spot where Stefan had stood mere moments ago. He wasn't serious, was he? He had already tried leaving town, leaving me, but he had ended up returning. He would come back again, right? Right?

Tears slowly started forming in my eyes as the cool wind brushed against my skin. It wasn't right. He shouldn't be the one to make those kinds of decisions for me. I was in love with him, I _wanted_ to be with him. And he had turned his back on me. Not because he didn't care about me, but because he believed it wasn't right. I shouldn't be in a relationship with a vampire, it was too dangerous. He was wrong, and he would realize it sooner than later. He had to.

I didn't want to accept it, the prospect alone made my heart ache, but there was nothing that could change that nasty feeling on the pit of my stomach.

This was it. This was forever. Stefan had broken up with me. Stefan was gone.

"Enjoying the view, Elena?" I jumped a little in surprise when Damon appeared by my side, motioning at the forest ahead of us. I shook my head slowly from side to side, struggling to tear my gaze from the darkness and focus on him. When I succeeded, I barely had the time to catch a glimpse of a worried expression on his face, before it disappeared under that hard mask.

"What's up?" he asked cocking his head to the side "Lover's quarrel?"

"He… he left," I replied, and if he weren't a vampire, I doubt he would have been able to hear me "I told him that I love him, and he just walked away," I explained, desperately trying to hold back a sob. Actually saying it out loud made it feel so much more real. So much more painful.

"Let's get you inside," Damon said picking me up bridal style. If it was any other time, I would have complained. Damon was dangerous, and selfish. He didn't care about anyone. Or so he wanted us all to believe. But I could barely feel my legs; there was no way I would have made it inside the house, or anywhere else for that matter, in one piece. My head was heavy on my shoulders, memories of Stefan, and our time together flashing behind my eyelids. So, I leaned against Damon's shoulder, allowing him to carry me, and letting my tears ran freely down my cheeks.

He moved so quietly that I only realized we had entered the Boarding House by the change of temperature. The goosebumps disappeared from my body, and I involuntarily relaxed further into his embrace. Damon carefully sat down on the couch, his intense stare burning through my skin. I refused to look up at him, instead choosing to press my forehead against his chest. He was warm, his smell comforting. Not that I would ever admit it aloud. Damon, however, wasn't a man to give up so easily. His fingertips traced the outline of my jaw, ever so gently lifting my head upwards. I tried to resist, but I was no match against his strength.

With a final sniff, our eyes met, brown with blue. I could sense my lips trembling as his gaze penetrated me. It made me feel uncomfortable for a reason, and I looked back down again. Down at his expensive black shirt. His wet expensive black shirt.

"I ruined your shirt," I murmured in a hoarse voice, wincing at how awful I sounded.

"I'm sure it looks better than you," Damon joked "your eyes are a mess, your nose would make Rudolf hide in shame, and you should really think about killing the cat on your head."

"Thanks, Damon," I said sarcasm coloring my voice "you're helping very much." I tried to stand up, even though I still didn't have full control of my limbs, but Damon's hands gripped my shoulders, halting my moves.

"Hey, I was just trying to lighten up the mood. There is only so much doom and gloom this vampire can take." His eyes were still playful, but there was some honesty in there, too. And perhaps a little bit of regret.

"I know," I replied, and sighed. "I shouldn't have snapped at you, actually I should be the one th.." the next thing I knew, Damon's index finger was on my lips, silencing me.

"Don't," he whispered "After all, look what I've achieved," he added in his usual chipper voice "Elena Gilbert is sitting on my lap, _willingly_! That's a first!"

"You know, for a moment you made me think that there was something wrong with you. You spent like what… ten minutes being serious, without being a flirt? That's never happened before!" I replied rolling my eyes, as the corners of my lips lifted in a tiny smile.

"That's more like it!" Damon exclaimed, tapping my mouth, and smirking. He then pushed me towards the corner of the couch, and stood up. I watched the back of his lean body as he walked to a cupboard at the other side of the room. His fingers clasped around a bottle of scotch, and he was soon pouring himself a generous amount of the liquid. And then some more. And some more. My eyes widened on their own accord. Exactly how much alcohol could he consume in a day?

"So, my dear brother left?" Damon asked glancing at me, and taking a sip from the newly filled tumbler. My chest constricted a little too violently as I remembered the reason why I was there talking with Damon. Stefan was gone. I nodded in response.

"I'm not buying that," he said, and I frowned in confusion. "Come on, Elena, it's not a secret. Stefan has never trusted me. He would never leave you in a room alone with me, much less if he were God knows how many miles away."

"He doesn't care, Damon," I replied in a trembling voice "this is the answer to your question. He probably never really did."

"It's his loss," he breathed softly as a tear ran down my face "Now, how about you stop going all Notebook on me? It's not going to make neither one of us better."

"You know what?" I said, hastily wiping my cheeks with the back of my sleeve "You're right. He should be here fighting for me, fighting for us. If he finds it so easy to walk away from me, it means he never really cared enough to stay. I don't want that. I don't want him."

"Hear hear!" Damon cheered, his eyes glinting as he tipped the glass towards me, before downing the rest of his drink.

Feeling a lot better than before, I glanced at my watch. 22.30, and it was a school night. Probably time to head home. "I should go, Jenna will start worrying, and frantically calling my cell," I murmured, sitting up. I wobbled lightly, but the dizziness was soon gone, leaving me standing steadily on my own feet. I couldn't help but smile.

"You could always crash here," Damon suggested waltzing towards me "you know, keep me company in this cold winter night," he added in a husky voice, and wiggled his eyebrows.

"It's still autumn," I pointed out, walking past him, so that he wouldn't see me smiling.

"Your loss," he replied, and I chuckled, as I saw from the corner of my eye that he shrugged his shoulders, and plopped down on an armchair.

"Good night, Damon."

"Good night, Elena."

* * *

><p>"Elena?" Bonnie's worried voice came through my cell phone "I've been trying to reach you for hours now! What happened? Are you okay?"<p>

"No, not really," I replied sitting up on the bed, and resting my head on the headpost.

"What is it?"

"Stefan," I whispered "he left."

There was a long pause, an awkward one, and then Bonnie asked for clarification. Not that I wasn't expecting it. "What do you mean he left?"

"He…" I took a deep breath, searching for the right words to use. "He left town, Bonnie, just like he had said he would. I tried to persuade him that he's done more good, than bad in my life, but he insisted that he was doing it for me." Now that I'd started, I couldn't find it in me to stop. "I told him that I loved him, and he said 'goodbye Elena' and disappeared. Just like that. And now I feel so silly for actually believing that this would have worked out. I mean he was never completely honest to me, Bonnie. There was always something that he would keep from me, something that he thought I wouldn't be able to handle. How is a relationship supposed to work like that?" My voice had almost turned into a scream towards the end. Perhaps if I'd thrown all this frustration at Stefan, the situation would have been different. Perhaps, he would have changed his mind. Perhaps, he would be by my side now.

"You know what I think, Elena?" I all but gasped as my train of thoughts was interrupted. I had almost forgotten I was one the phone.

"What?"

"I think it's better that he left, no matter what the reason. Let's be realistic, what kind of future would you have together? He's a vampire, and you're a human!" And that's the second thing I expected to hear from Bonnie. She wouldn't be able to focus on our issues with Stefan, instead she'd turn this into a debate around vampires and how they don't deserve real relationships. I couldn't deal with that at that point.

"I don't know, Bonnie," I replied shaking my head "right now, I don't know anything. When did our lives get so complicated?" It was not that long ago our only worries were school, and homework, and what to wear to the next big Mystic Falls event.

"Everything will be normal in time."

"Do you think so?"

"I hope so."

"Goodnight, Bonnie, I'll see you tomorrow at school."

"Sleep tight, Elena."

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><p>It was about a week later that I found myself knocking on the door of the Salvatore mansion.<p>

"Elena Gilbert! What an _unexpected_ surprise!" Damon greeted me, smirking as always. I pushed my hands inside the pockets of my jeans.

"Can I come in?" I asked hesitantly, shifting uneasily on my feet while his gaze traveled up and down my body. His eyes were narrowed as he took a step backwards, giving me room to walk past him.

"So, what's up, Elena? You couldn't spend more than twenty hours away from my gorgeous self?" He drawled as we entered the parlor.

"I just didn't want to be alone," I replied honestly, sitting down at the edge of the couch. Today for some reason my mood was particularly foul. It had taken all of my will power to get out of the bed and drive to school. Where I was alone, and feeling miserable. I wanted to break out of this dark bubble.

"And you came to _me_?" Damon asked again, an incredulous look in his eyes.

"Bonnie's at her Grams', Caroline is with Matt all the time, and Stefan is…"

"Gone," he finished my sentence. "Okay, so what did you have in mind? Slumber party? Strip poker? FYI, I happen to be wearing my good underwear." I managed a scowl in his direction.

"Damon," I scolded.

"Ugh, you're boring," he whined, leaning against the wet bar across the room. "We need to fix that. But first of all, call that aunt of yours. Tell her you're spending the night at Blondie's. Or Sabrina's. Whatever."

"Damon!" I exclaimed, this time in shock. "I'm not going to sleep here."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't trust you."

"Oh, really? So, you're basically saying that in the last few days you've been hanging out with the deceitful Dracula in his creepy manor?"

"That's not what I meant." But my voice was weak, revealing what I deep down knew to be true. Damon wouldn't hurt me. If he wanted to, he could have done it in one of the many hours we'd spent together over the last seven days.

"Come on! Stop being such a drama queen! We both know you'll stay here in the end."

"Fine," I huffed in annoyance, typing a message for Jenna. "Now what?"

"Now, we need music!" Damon announced, flashing me his white teeth, before disappearing in another room. By the time he was back, the first notes of the song had reached my ears, and it wasn't hard to recognize it. What _was_ hard, was figuring out the reason why Damon would have it around.

"Pink, Damon?" I exclaimed in surprise, letting him grab my wrists and effortlessly pull me from the couch "You are listening to Pink?"

"When you spend so much time around young chicks, you've got to get used to their taste in music. Even if you think it sucks," he replied, moving us at the centre of the room.

"It sucks, huh?" I removed my hands from his grasp, so that I could take off my jacket, which I tossed in the general direction of the sofa. "So, what? You are an opera-kind of guy? Or maybe you prefer rock? Jazz?"

"Wouldn't you like to know," he murmured cryptically, wrapping his fingers around my hand, and making me twirl towards him. I couldn't help but giggle as I collided with his chest, and he winked before releasing me.

I started singing -admittedly, louder than I normally would- along the lyrics, while I moved to the beat, my arms raised high above my head.

"_This used to be our funhouse, but now it's full of evil clowns, it's time to start the countdown, I'm gonna burn it down, down, down_."

"It's a good thing you're not singing often," Damon said loud enough for me to hear. I glared at him playfully as he blurred on top of the coffee table, where he started moving his hips so passionately that I felt like laughing uncontrollably.

"Are you implying that I've cracked a note?" I asked as I danced to the hall, and up the stairs.

"No, I'm implying that you can't carry a tune in a bucket," he replied catching up with me "your dancing on the other hand, is quite the show to watch," he whispered placing his hand at the small of my back, and bringing our bodies closer.

A couple of songs later, and we were dancing on the corridor of the second floor. Damon's phone buzzed between our thighs, and I chuckled, as I moved away from him. He offered me a cheeky smile, before glancing at the screen.

"Duty calls. Gotta take this," he said pouting, and after spinning me around, blurred downstairs.

I leaned against the wall, breathing heavily, and smiling like an idiot. Never before had I realized how much dancing can improve your mood. To be honest, I hadn't felt so alive in a very long time. I glanced around the unfamiliar surroundings, the beautiful paintings on the wall grabbing my attention. But that was before I noticed that towards the end of the hall, there was a half-open door. I checked that Damon was still downstairs, and approached the room. I hesitated for a second… snooping around other people's houses, isn't the politest thing to do. Then I remembered how Damon never respects anyone's privacy, so I shook my head, and opening the door wider, walked inside.

It was clearly someone's bedroom. There was a bed at the farthest corner, and the walls were almost entirely covered with bookcases. There was only a small window, in front of which stood a black desk. Its surface was hidden away from view, due to the several books, and notebooks laid there…My heart skipped a beat, when I recognized one of the notebooks as Stefan's. So, this was Stefan's bedroom. Looking around more carefully, I was also able to spot his school bag, which was thrown at the foot of his bed, and one of his jackets, draped at the back of a chair.

I inhaled deeply through my nose, hoping that the fresh air would help me clear my head. Being in his room for the first time, and moreover without him, made the fact that he had left me even more real, even more painful. Why was I even doing this to myself? Scoffing, I started moving towards the door, when something in my peripheral vision made me stop dead on my tracks. There was something lying on the carpet in front of the body-length mirror. I walked closer, and picked up what seemed to be a piece of paper. I turned it around, and found myself staring at a very old picture of a girl. She seemed to be dark skinned, and she had long curly brown hair. She also looked familiar. Unnaturally familiar, that is. I gasped when I realized why.

She was the Victorian version of me.

"Elena?" I heard Damon's voice calling me, but I couldn't find it in me to turn around. Not yet, because there was more. On the right corner of the picture there was a writing: _Katherine, 1864._ I tossed the photo away, as if it had burnt me. I swallowed hard, while my poor mind struggled to comprehend the meaning of that photo. A girl. Katherine. A replica of me… she was the one that had broken the Salvatore brothers apart, all the way back in 1864. How was that possible? Why was that picture still around, so many years later? Almost on autopilot, I made it to the corridor, where I met Damon. His expression was relaxed, the glint in his eyes the definition of excitement. Did he know, too? Of course he knew…Stefan wasn't the only Salvatore in love with Katherine back in the day.

"There you are!" Damon said, completely unaware of my raging emotions and mental battle. He was holding a bottle of wine, and two glasses in his hands.

"Why do I look like her?" I asked firmly, making him freeze on the spot. The smile fell from his lips, his eyes widened.

"Excuse me?" he blurted out.

"Why do I look like her?" I repeated, enunciating every word, every syllable. "and don't even try to deny it, I just saw her picture, and it's like we're the same person." I was shaking. Literally shaking.

"Stefan never…"

"Told me?" I squeaked, interrupting him mid sentence. "No."

"No, of course he didn't," he mumbled under his breath, and it would have been hard not to notice the venom in his voice.

I don't know what I was hoping for… Damon to take my hand, sit down with me, and tell me the sad little story of the Salvatore brothers? Or maybe the other story, the one that held the answers to the mystery of the existence of my who-knows-how-old twin? Regardless, Damon sliding down the wall until he was sitting on the wooden floor, and pouring wine, had never crossed my mind.

"What are you doing?" I asked him incredulously.

"Alcohol," he said behind gritted teeth, raising one of the glasses in the air, and blankly staring at the liquid inside. "It can help you forget. If only for a while."

"I don't need to forget, Damon! I need to know why I look like her," I demanded, losing my patience. Apparently, I had crossed some line with my outburst, because the next second, Damon was glaring at me, eyes dark and dangerous, his face contorted in a tight grimace.

"I don't know, Elena," he yelled, his voice filling every inch of the room, and making me flinch. "You think I wasn't as surprised as you are, when I came back to Mystic Falls to get back the only woman I'd ever loved, and instead found her human lookalike wandering the streets? Do you think you're the only one whose life is a big fucked up mess? Because then you're an idiot. _You_ don't have to go on knowing that the one you love will never be free again."

I looked away from him, as I felt tears gathering in my eyes. This wasn't his fault, he wasn't the one I should be attacking.

"I'm sorry," I whispered as I sank on the floor next to him "I know how much Katherine meant to you. And you're not the one who should be answering these questions, anyway."

The following minutes were spent in silence that was only broken by the sounds of Damon drinking glass after glass of wine, and my raged breaths. My thoughts kept wandering back to Stefan. I couldn't help but wonder who I was to him. Did he think that he could use me to replace her? Did I really know him that little? Was I so mistaken? And how did I end up looking exactly like her, anyway? Was I her descendant, somehow? Did that make me part vampire?

"Stefan has always liked being a know-it-all," Damon said out of the blue, and I twisted my neck to gaze at him. "I'm betting my ass that after he saw you, and after he had recovered from the mini heart-attack, he went all Wikipedia on the matter. On you, and your connection to Katherine."

"But he's gone, so it's not like we can ask him," I pointed out.

"He also has that annoying habit of keeping a journal," he added fixing his eyes on me, and shrugging "never really understood why, but damn, sometimes it's better than Men's Health and Playboy altogether."

"So, I'm going to have to go through his diary," I muttered more to myself than him. Even at the mere thought, I felt guilty. I knew that I would never want someone to read _my_ journal, but what if Stefan had in fact discovered something? What if this was the only way to find out the truth?

Without a word I reached for the bottle between us, and lifted it, bottoms up. My lips closed around the neck, and I gulped down a mouthful of wine. Red. I liked red. Damon chuckled beside me, resting his head against the wall, and closing his eyes. I ignored him. This wasn't a night for answers. This wasn't a night for conversations. This was just a night for me to be numb. A night to pretend that I was no one, that I had no issues to deal with.

Tomorrow would be a new day. A day with a purpose.

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><p><strong>P.S. A big 'thank you' goes to my awesome beta Grace4Delena .<strong>

**You can follow me on twitter: ts_eirini**


	3. Secrets revealed

**Disclaimer: I don't own TVD, even though I'd love to!**

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><p>The first thing I was aware of was the insistent pounding inside my head. Like someone was hammering on my skull, again, and again. My brain was still not functioning properly, my thoughts were hazy, confusing. It took a while until flashes of the previous evening started taking shape behind my eyelids… Biting down on my lip as I drove to the Boarding house. Damon wiggling his eyebrows as we danced. Katherine, 1864. My giggles when I slipped on my way up the stairs and Damon pulled me tightly against him to keep me from falling on my ass. Stefan's bedroom. Alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol. <em>"Why do I look like her?" <em>My last memory was drowsing in the dark corridor, a bottle on my lap, as I quietly hummed a song. It was getting harder and harder to keep my eyes open, and I must have moaned in relief when Morpheus's arms finally wrapped around my exhausted body.

I hesitantly ran a hand over the surface I was currently lying down on, and almost gasped, when my fingers touched silk. Where was the hall's uncomfortable wooden floor? How did I get myself into a bed? This wasn't good, this wasn't good at all. Taking a deep breath to brace myself, I opened my eyes. For a moment everything was white, a dazzling white that blinded me. Slowly, the outlines of objects started forming in front of me, and soon, I was staring straight at Damon's very asleep face. Crap.

_How_ had we ended up in the same bed? Why? What had I done under the effect of alcohol? I hadn't had sex in months. One would think I'd cling to the memory with a passion. And yet... wouldn't I feel different? Shouldn't I be naked? The warmth of my clothes against my skin helped in keeping my panic at check, and after a closer look to the vampire that was on his side next to me, I noticed that he was still wearing the same black button-down shirt. A sigh escaped me. No Elena/Damon drunken sex had taken place last night. Which was good, because that would only complicate things between us.

I rubbed my eyes with the back of my hands, willing the sleepiness to completely leave my system. Then, I propped my head on one elbow, gazing down at the peacefully sleeping Damon. He looked so innocent, with his fair complexion, and random black locks falling on his eyes. My fingers twitched to move them back against his forehead, but I remained still for fear of waking him up. His lips were slightly apart, his chest moving up and down with every breath he took. He looked almost human. He definitely didn't look half as the monster he pretended to be. In a moment of clarity I realized that this, this was the truth. Damon was constantly trying to protect himself by building thick walls around him, by pushing everyone away, by terrorizing whoever even thought of getting closer. These last few days, however, had provided me with enough clues as to how he really was, how he really looked inside. He was hurt. Suffering, like we all do. And he is scared of ever going through the same pain again. Even though I doubted he would admit this any time soon. With a sigh, I rolled around to get out of the bed.

After taking a painkiller for my terrible headache, and pouring myself a glass of orange juice, I made my way up the stairs, and straight to Stefan's bedroom. In the morning light I could see more details that I had overlooked yesterday. It would have probably taken me hours to study all of the antique objects positioned around the room. But this wasn't a History class trip to the local museum. Ignoring the pangs of pain I could feel in my heart, I piled the notebooks that were scattered around the desk. _Now, where would I keep my_ _journals, especially if I was a one hundred and sixty something years old vampire, meaning that I would have lots of them?_ I thought, as I glanced around, one hand resting on the side of my waist. There were really several choices, the wardrobe, a set of drawers opposite the bed, any one of the shelves. My eyes narrowed when I spotted a cupboard placed directly across the desk. I approached it almost tentatively, and gently pulled the door open. Bingo!

My hand ghosted above the spines of the diaries that were dated from 1860 all the way up to 2009. Sure, I'd known that Stefan, and Damon were old, but only in that moment was I able to comprehend exactly how many memories, how many experiences they truly had. World War I, World War II, the Titanic, the assassination of John F. Kennedy… They hadn't just watched The History Channel; they were actually alive while they transpired. It was oddly intimidating.

I picked up the one from 2009, and made myself comfortable in the office chair. Unlike yesterday, I couldn't feel the slightest amount of guilt, or regret. It was Stefan's secrecy that had brought me here, his own lies that had forced me to disrespect his privacy. I flipped through the first hundred of pages, only stopping when I reached the first day of the school year. The first day we ever laid eyes on each other. Monday 30th August.

_Monday August 30th 2009_

_For over a century, I've lived in secret, hiding in the shadows, alone in the world. Until now. I know the risk, but I had to know her._

_I saw her today, for the first time without having to hide. I could finally talk to her. And it was better than I had ever imagined. Her voice like honey, caressing my ears with every syllable. Just like I remembered. She is beautiful, gorgeous even, but I can see the pain in her eyes. She smiles, tries to mask it, but I can see through it._

_I spent all the classes that we have together staring at her, memorizing every detail of her chocolate hair, of the curve of her nose, of her rosy lips. I knew that she could feel my eyes on her, I counted the seconds until she gathered the courage to turn around and meet my gaze. Then, she would blush, blood rushing up to those soft cheeks, and smile warmly. Oh, that smile… how much I love it. How much I've missed it… _

_It wasn't enough. I thought that after spending an entire morning around her, I would be satisfied._

_I wasn't. _

_Afternoon came, and I couldn't help following her around town. She talked with one of her friends at the park for a while, and then she bid her goodbye, before hurrying towards the cemetery. _

_I felt guilty, then. It wasn't right invading her privacy, not in those few moments she wanted to spend with her parents. I wandered around, trying to keep myself busy by searching for the tombstones of descendants of the original families. But I still kept an eye out for her. That was how I realized something was wrong. _

_She was running, the pounding of her shoes against the ground extremely loud for my vampire senses. Her heart was beating loudly inside her chest. She was scared. I caught up with her as she was pushing herself off the ground. She was startled by my sudden appearance. We talked again, the sweetness of her voice soothing my heart. It was nice. Familiar. Almost. Not quite._

_Until I smelt it. Blood. Warm fresh human blood. My whole body went rigid._

_It's been a long time since I've last tasted human blood, and I almost lost control. Everything I've kept buried inside, came rushing to the surface. But I couldn't hurt her, I can't risk losing her… Losing her too, would break me in pieces. I couldn't survive it. _

_She doesn't know. She can't understand how important she is to me. She doesn't know how often I dream of her. _

_She doesn't know a lot of things. _

_In her mind, I am just the new boy who is crushing on her. My feelings are running so much deeper than that._

_In her mind, our first meeting was today, when she awkwardly bumped into me outside the boys' restroom. How wrong she is... May 23rd, 2009. That was when I met her for the first time. That was when my life started having a meaning again._

I gulped loudly, my vision blurred from the tears that were springing to my eyes. This wasn't an entry about me, not at all. This was just an extended comparison between me, and Katherine. Was that the only reason Stefan had ever been interested in me? My similarity to her? Was she all he could ever see in me? It hurt me. More than I expected. More than I had thought humanly possible.

My fingers trembled as I turned the pages around.

_Saturday, May 23rd 2009. _

This wasn't a random date. Not for me. Not for my family. It was the date of the car crash. What did Stefan have to do with it?

I couldn't read through the whole passage. I was too shaken for that. Isolated words seemingly jumped from the paper, demanding my attention.

_This evening …old Wickery bridge… a car going off…. submerged… swam to the car… the driver… still conscious… helped the girl first… went back for them… too late… I looked at her face… like Katherine… can't be Katherine… she was burnt… what if it wasn't real? … what if she's still alive?_

Loud sobs escaped me as I rushed forward, glancing at the pages, looking for something relevant, for something helpful. A few sheets gave in under the pressure of my fingers, tearing in half. I didn't care. I couldn't care.

_Sunday, August 2nd 2009_

_For months… watched her… learnt everything about her… tried to explain … didn't make sense….Elena a Gilbert… Katherine a Pierce… found the truth… Elena is adopted… want to leave town… can't leave without knowing her… looks just like Katherine… feel closer to Katherine… have to try._

_Adopted._

I threw the diary on the desk, and jumped off the chair. This was too much. Way too much. I desperately ran my fingers through my hair, as I paced up and down the length of the room. _Adopted._ It was like this one word was now permanently imprinted on my retinas. It was all I could see, and all I could think of. _Adopted. _Adopted? How? Why had no one told me? How couldn't I have ever suspected anything?

Gazing out of the window to the massive backyard of the Salvatore mansion, I felt like the ground was disappearing below my feet. Everything was changing, every day a new revelation, a new lie popping up to be added in the ever-growing pile. Everyone, every single person in my life had kept something from me. How could I trust anyone ever again? How, when my own parents had never once in my seventeen years bothered telling me the truth?

I'd never before felt so betrayed. I could sense the disappointment coursing through my veins, making me literally see red. There was also anger, raging, hot anger. I felt like I would explode any moment now. Their faces kept swirling around my mind. Stefan, my mom, my dad. Aunt Jenna, she probably knew, too. There was no way they could have hid it from her. Uncle John? Most probably. They swirled and swirled until I was dizzy, until the room was spinning around me, as well. I gulped down the juice, relishing in the sensation of the cold liquid slipping down my throat. I reached out to place the glass back on the desk, but my hands were shaking, and it crashed down on the floor instead. The thick carpet muffled the sound considerably, and I chose to ignore the shattered pieces. It wasn't like anyone would be using this room anytime soon.

I tiptoed to Damon's bedroom, and leaned against the doorframe for support. He was still fast asleep, although he had now shifted on his back, and one arm was thrown over his eyes. It was a good thing I hadn't woken him up with my clumsiness. I didn't want him to see me like this. I didn't want to burden him.

I drove back home in a daze. My grasp on the steering wheel was loose, the window pulled down, letting the air brush against my face. _Adopted. _It wasn't the fact itself that bothered me so much, not really. What was worse was that everyone had lied to me, and I had to find out from a completely irrelevant to the whole issue person, in the strangest way possible. I deserved better than that, didn't I?

After shutting the door of the car with much more force than what was actually needed, I walked into the house. I had a plan. Go straight into my room, talk to no one, and try to calm down on my own. When had my plans ever worked out?

"I don't set a lot of rules, Elena, not with you," Jenna called out as she rushed out of the kitchen and stepped in front of me, blocking my way. "I trust you to tell me the truth. Bonnie called a few minutes ago, asking for you. Where were you, why would you lie to me about it? I thought we were closer than that."

"Now, is not the time you want to talk to me about lies," I warned through locked teeth, glaring at her.

"Don't do that," she complained "don't turn this back on me. I didn't do anything."

"Okay, question," I said, finally having lost my patience. I wasn't planning on bringing up the subject until I had some time to think it through. But when she acted like that, she didn't leave me with much of a choice. "Am I adopted?" She paled, her jaw dropped. "I trust you to tell me the truth too, Jenna. How could you not tell me? I thought we were closer than that." I used her own words, throwing them back to her with all the pain I had inside me. I saw her eyes filling with regret, but I was too furious to care.

"Elena, I didn't…" she murmured softly "they asked me not to."

"I don't want to hear it."

* * *

><p>"I think you should just talk to Jenna," Bonnie said simply, staring at me from the other side of the table. It was late Monday evening, and we were hanging out at the Grill.<p>

"I don't know…"

"First of all, the Elena I know would always want the real truth, good or bad."

"And second of all?" I had spent the greatest part of the weekend locked into my bedroom, pondering, thinking, remembering. I had spent so many hours with my parents, we were a particularly close family. Couldn't they find one right moment to tell me the truth?

"You recently found out that you were dating a vampire, and that your best friend is a witch, so unless your birthparents are aliens, how bad could it be?" I chuckled inwardly as I realized that Bonnie didn't even know the whole truth. There was also that tiny, completely insignificant matter of Katherine, my dead vampire look-alike.

"You're probably right," I replied, fiddling with my napkin. Jenna could help me get the answers I needed. I knew that. But I wasn't sure if I was ready to confront her, yet. Or maybe I wasn't as ready as I thought I was to discover the truth… What if my story was one of those tragic ones, where a kid is found in a trash can, or abandoned at the side of the road. How would I react? How would it made me feel, the fact that my birth parents didn't care enough and gave me away?

"So, you never told me," Bonnie quickly changed the subject, and I was more than grateful. "Where were you the whole weekend?" Or maybe not so grateful, after all.

"Hm, I was actually with Damon," I breathed hesitantly, fully aware that she wouldn't react nicely to my words.

"What?" she screamed, her eyes widening, and several people that were sitting on the nearby tables turned to stare at us.

"Bonnie," I scolded her, giving apologetic looks to those around us. That wasn't exactly called being polite.

"Why would you be spending time with him, Elena? Are you completely out of your mind? Or did you forget everything that he's done?" I could hear the anger, and the hurt in her voice.

"Bonnie, I know that Damon tried to hurt you…"

"He tried to kill me," she corrected me in a grave voice.

"But he was upset," I tried to reason with her "I understand that he's responsible for some very horrible actions, but there's more in him that just the cocky, evil jerk he wants us to see." So much more. If only he actually let people see it.

"Are you listening to yourself right now?"

"Bonnie, he's been through a lot. Don't judge him too hard."

"Why are you defending him?"

"Because I know how much he is hurting, and despite everything else, he was there when I needed a friend. He was there to comfort me, and help me feel better. He was there. And he was good."

"I can't believe that this is really happening," Bonnie murmured shaking her head. I reached for her hand.

"Please, Bonnie, will you just give him a second chance?" she glared at my hand that was gently wrapped around her wrist, before pulling away.

"Listen to me, Elena, Damon might have fooled you, but I won't fall for his tricks. He hurt Caroline, he turned Vicky, and he tried to kill me. He's a monster, why can you not see this?"

"Bonnie…"

"No, Elena, I won't give him a second chance, and right now, I'm warning you to stay away from him. He's dangerous, and he will hurt you, don't think for a second that he won't. Stefan left, and this is your chance to get away from all this craziness. If you get close to Damon, this chance will slip right out of your hands. I know you're a smart girl, and I trust you to make the right decision. So, please do yourself a favour, and stay the hell away from him." Having said that, she swiftly stood up, grabbed her jacket, and stormed outside.

I sat there for a couple of minutes, my elbows resting on the table, my fingers lost in my hair. Bonnie was right to be afraid of Damon. She didn't know better. She couldn't know better. Yes, he could be quite unpredictable, especially when he wasn't in a good mood. I couldn't disagree on that. But there was so much more in him. So much more that was worth finding out.

Sighing heavily, I glanced down at my cell phone for what was probably the hundredth time today. No new messages, no missed phone calls. I couldn't help but frown. Over the last week, me and Damon had made a habit out of constantly checking on each other. We would talk on the phone at least once every day, and text for many hours. So, I was actually expecting him to try to contact me, after he'd woken up yesterday, and understood that I'd left. Maybe he didn't really care whether I was fine, or not. Maybe I was just a girl he had an entertaining week with, and now he wouldn't even say hi, when we would meet again. It made sense, in a way. But it also didn't.

During the drive back home, I tried to push him to the back of my mind, I struggled to persuade myself that what I thought was a friendship in progress was nothing but a lie. But just couldn't. And then, there was that annoying nagging feeling, that something was wrong. Terribly wrong. I slammed on the brakes hard, and the car came to an abrupt halt. Not wasting another second, I made a U-turn, and drumming my fingers on the wheel, drove to the Salvatore house. By the time I got there, I was positively freaking out.

I chuckled at my weird behaviour, what could have possibly happened? I was probably just overreacting. I knocked on the heavy door, and shifted my weight from one foot to the other as I waited for Damon to answer the door, his annoying smirk in place, a tumbler of bourbon in hand. I knocked again. No reply. I took a deep breath to regain my composure, and pushed the door lightly. Sure enough, it opened, and I couldn't help rolling my eyes. Apparently, when you are a vampire, thieves aren't exactly a threat. As soon as I set my foot on the hallway, I was assaulted by an unpleasant stuffy smell and the sour odour of alcohol.

"Damon?" I called, closing the door behind me, and making my way to the living room. I found no sign of him, but I couldn't miss the pieces of a glass close to the wall. I searched the rest of the first floor, and when I came up with nothing, I went up the stairs. His room looked pretty much like I had left it yesterday, with the only exception of him not being in there sleeping calmly. I smiled at that memory.

Getting back to the long corridor, I narrowed my eyes, focusing on Stefan's bedroom. I shuddered, realizing that it was quickly becoming one of my least favourite places ever... Then, a thought crossed my mind, and running there, I violently opened the door.

A loud gasp escaped my lips, as I took everything in.

* * *

><p><strong>P.S. A big 'thank you' goes to my awesome beta Grace4Delena . Do me a favor, and go read her brilliant one-shots! <strong>

**You can follow me on twitter: ts_eirini**


	4. We'll get through this

**Disclaimer: I don't own TVD, even though I'd love to!**

* * *

><p><em>Previously, on Learning To Love Again….<em>

_Getting back to the long corridor, I narrowed my eyes, focusing on Stefan's bedroom. I shuddered, realizing that it was quickly becoming one of my least favourite places ever... Then, a thought crossed my mind, and running there, I violently opened the door. _

_A loud gasp escaped my lips, as I took everything in._

The doors of the cupboards were open, the desk was overthrown, resulting in the books that I had stacked up just three days ago to be scattered on the floor. The various trinkets that had previously occupied the shelves were now shattered in pieces on the floor. The curtains were no longer hanging in front of the window; instead, they were tangled in a tight mess along with the bedspread, and thrown far away from their original positions. Feathers, and torn pages were covering almost every surface of the room. It was pure chaos.

And in the middle of it, was Damon. He was sprawled on the floor, several –empty- bottles around him, and was that a piece of paper clutched between his fingers? _What the hell happened in here?_ I approached him slowly, trying hard not to trip on anything.

"Damon?" I whispered, gently dropping my hand on his back. "What happened?" It took him a few moments to respond, but his head was still turned away from me, and I couldn't look into his eyes. I could only hear his voice.

"She never loved me. It was always Stefan." He sounded broken. And it wasn't hard to guess the reason. As far as I knew, there was only one person, one woman that could affect Damon so much.

"Katherine."

"Get out of here, Elena," Damon mumbled, and I could practically see the wall rising, I could feel it against my skin, pushing me away.

"No."

"You don't get to bitch about this, Elena," he growled, turning on his back so that he could openly glare at me. "I let you drown in your self-pity."

"What are you even talking about?" I demanded, beyond confused. He rolled his eyes. It was pretty amazing he could do that even with his eyelids closed.

"You think I didn't hear you moping around the other day?" my jaw dropped as I figured out what he was talking about. He hadn't been asleep after all. "You broke a glass, Elena. I am not the sleeping freaking beauty. I am a vampire. Super-senses, remember? I can also rip your throat apart, before you can even blink. And believe me, right now, I really, really want to." He stared hungrily at my neck, and if it were a month ago, I probably would have run away screaming. But I knew better now. I knew _him_ better now. I knew what I had to do.

I exited the room hastily, and fetched a bottle of bourbon from downstairs, along with two tumblers. When I got back, Damon hadn't moved a muscle, and I approached him, purposefully holding the bottle high.

"You could do that. Or you could join me for a drink." Damon looked at me through narrowed eyes. I had gotten his attention. Point for me. "Come on, Damon. You know you want it!" I shook the glasses in the air, theatrically. In response, he groaned, and started struggling to push himself off the floor. At least that's what I think he was trying to do. After several minutes of failed attempts, he let his head fall on the floor with a thud, and finally spoke.

"Are you going to just stand there, or are you helping me get up so that I can have my fucking drink?" Suppressing a smile, I approached him, and helped him throw his arm over my shoulder. With some effort, I managed to get both of us to stand, and I started walking out of the room. Damon had apparently a different plan, since he planted his feet on the ground, and refused to move.

"Where the hell are we going?" he demanded.

"To your room?" Damon drunkenly grinned at that.

"Well, well, Elena. Are you making a move?" I gave him an eye-roll, and placed a tumbler in each of his hands. I needed to distract him. And anyway, I couldn't carry both booze, and Damon at the same time.

"You think you can hold those?" He winked, and nodded.

"Honey, I'm holding onto them for dear life."

"Good for them. Come on, now, one foot after the other."

It was no easy feat making it all the way back to his room, and when I finally let him drop lightly on the bed, I could feel a faint ache starting to build at my waist. Huh. He couldn't walk in a straight line, but he still hadn't let go of the glasses. Typical. Shaking my head, I took possession of the tumblers and filled them with the amber liquid. I offered one back to Damon, who took it, and drank. Drank most of it, actually. The rest went down his chin, soaking him, and his bed. He carelessly left the glass fall on the ground, and moaned lowly, shifting until he was on his side.

"Man, I'm wasted…" I frowned as I noticed how pale his complexion was. Much paler than usual, and definitely much paler than what is considered normal, even for vampires.

"You have to…" I swallowed audibly, struggling to hide my inconvenience "_eat _something." We had never exactly discussed the practicalities of his nature. I had no idea how he found the blood he needed to survive, but the image of his imprinted teeth on Caroline's body was forever stored in my brain. I didn't know any better.

"Are you offering?" Oh no. No way.

"No. And you either tell me how to get blood into you without tapping a vein, or I swear to God, I'm going to spoon-feed you a squirrel."

Sure, I wasn't an expert in nursing a drunk starving heart-broken vampire, but at least we had one thing in common; we had both been betrayed. I guess we could help each other feel better. Isn't that what friends are supposed to do? Wasn't that what we were, _friends,_ after all the time we'd spent together?

"You really mean that, don't you?" he stared at me blankly. I closed my lips tightly and nodded. Was he finally starting to get it through his head? Wow. That was fast.

"Just grab me a couple of blood bags from the cooler in the basement," he said, and I barely kept my expression neutral. _Blood bags?_

"Okay, I can do that," I replied instead.

When I stepped into the bedroom, I found him sitting up on the mattress, his head resting against the headrest. His gaze immediately went at the blood bags that I was holding in my hands.

"Here," I said softly, placing them next to him. I watched him stretching out his hand, and blindly grabbing one from the pile. His face contorted in a pained grimace. Did such a small move cause him so much pain? Exactly how worn out was he? His gaze moved from the brown comforter to my face, and our eyes locked. I wanted so badly to look away, to look anywhere else but at his face. I didn't feel prepared to witness what was about to happen. I had accepted the fact that he was a vampire a long time ago, but this felt a little too much. And also intimate.

Apparently, I didn't want it that bad. Because for some odd reason, I couldn't turn around. I heard him take the lid off, and my eyes flickered to his lips, as they wrapped around the tube. I held my breath as he calmly sucked in, and the transparent material turned crimson from the blood that flowed towards his mouth. I involuntarily cocked my head to the side, and stared back at his eyes in amazement.

He was still Damon. He hadn't gotten all primal, he hadn't even changed into his vampire face. I was… awed. I guess I always expected vampires looking more like… well, vampires, while feeding. I guess I was wrong.

The blood he drank quickly brought back the color on his face, and after he was done with the third bag, he stretched his arms high above his head. His joints cracked, and he smirked like the Cheshire cat, clearly satisfied.

"A shower would be nice," I commented, wrinkling my nose. Going three days without a shower can make a person rather smelly, even a vampire.

"Sure, towels are in the wardrobe. Grab one for me too, and we're set to go."

I chuckled, shaking my head in disbelief. This was the Damon I knew. The constantly teasing one.

"I'm not coming with you, Damon," I murmured, walking towards the window, and opening it widely. I inhaled deeply, filling my lungs with fresh air.

"You're saying that you don't want to come?" Damon asked suggestively. I glanced at him over my shoulder as he unbuttoned his shirt, and carelessly tossed it on the bed. It was only natural for my gaze to wander down his toned chest. Did immortality come with perfect muscles? Or was it something he had to actually work to get?

"Get over yourself!" I chided, moving out of the bedroom as fast as I could, since I had a lot of cleaning to do. And a pair of burning cheeks that I didn't want him to see.

* * *

><p>By the time I was back, Damon was already into the bathroom, and puffs of steam were gracefully starting to fill his bedroom, making the air thick with water vapour. My breath hitched in my throat as I lingered by the opening in the wall leading to the bathroom, and stared into the foggy room. I could vaguely make out the shape of his body, and my over-active imagination was already working hard to come up with the details.<p>

Then, Damon started humming a song I couldn't recognise, and I jumped up in surprise. Could I be any creepier? Shaking my head, I moved further into the bedroom, forcing my self to focus on the task at hand. Tidying up.

After gathering the empty bottles, and throwing them in a huge garbage bag I had found downstairs, I decided to change the sheets of the bed. It wasn't hard to find a clean set, Damon actually had several of them stored on a shelf inside the wardrobe. Everything from black to white, meticulously folded, and making me wonder if he took care of the laundry himself.

Still smiling at the mental picture of him unloading the washing machine, I leaned down to remove the old pillowcases. That was when the piece of paper in my peripheral vision grabbed my attention. I bit down on my lower lip, while I contemplated the situation. The paper was crumpled and old, and the exact same page Damon was holding earlier. Whatever had caused him so much pain was written in there. Somehow, I doubted he'd be even remotely willing to share it with me. Chances were, as soon as he was out of the shower, he'd pretend that everything was all right, that he hadn't just gone through hell, and back in three days. But this wasn't right. He would never get over it, if he simply pushed it under the rug. And I wanted him to get over it, because he deserved it so much. He deserved better than a woman who would toy with his heart.

My mind was set.

_November 26th, 1864_

_Stefan,_

_I am writing this letter, as you are peacefully sleeping right next to me. I look at you, and my heart breaks at the thought that I will have to leave you behind._

_For years... for centuries I have wandered this Earth. I have seen it in all its might, and yet it seemed so meaningless, and distant._

_A long time ago I made a promise to myself. I promised I would never love. Nothing and no one._

_Love makes you weak. It is nothing but a liability. When you are a vampire, you can't allow yourself to indulge in such fickle pleasures. _

_Then I met you, and everything changed. Day after day, without me noticing, you crept your way into my heart, and somehow made it yours. _

_You, Stefan. Only you. Always._

_The thing is, for humans, always is just an expression. Something abstract, a mere word, used in poems and ballads. You cannot grasp the depth of it._

_That is why I am making this choice. To share eternity with you, my love. And with Damon. Yes. I have been making him compliant, by giving myself to him. He loves me, I think. And I do know you are upset by that._

_My sweet, young, jealous Stefan. You have to understand. I am 400 years old and loyalty and love have come to be complex concepts, to me. Have faith. He means nothing. He is nothing._

_Yet, I know how deep the bond of family is, and I fear that you will one day regret his mortality. By granting him the gift of immortality, I am giving you a choice. That is the one and only reason why I have been doing what I you have seen as betrayal. For you. For your happiness. _

_The town knows about us now._

_The people are getting smart and I am afraid that very soon I will be forced to leave._

_I promise you, we will meet again. When it will be safe for the both of us, I will find you and we shall be blessed with the beauty of our eternal love. Anytime, anywhere, any place. _

_I love you, Stefan. _

_Eternally,_

_Katherine._

Despite my shaking hands, I put the letter back where I had found it. My expression was hard as I let everything sink in. Katherine had been using Damon from the first moment. She had never cared for him, he was just a mean to an end. The love of her life… I scoffed, plopping down on the bed, and pulling my knees up to my chin. I couldn't begin to imagine how hard it was for him, realizing that you've spent over a century waiting for the return of a single woman, only to find out that she had betrayed you.

We had both been played.

Now everything made so much more sense, especially the time Stefan had decided to leave town. After it was perfectly clear that there was no way of opening the tomb, no way for him to get Katherine back, he couldn't find it in him to stay here, and keep pretending. I was apparently too much of a reminder for him. Since that was all I had ever been to him. In Stefan's eyes, I was never me, I was never Elena Gilbert. In his eyes, I was just a human, lucky enough to be blessed with the perfect looks of the perfect Katherine. Tears blurred my vision.

I didn't deserve that. Nobody deserved that. But life was never fair, and it would never get fair. All I could do was learn from my mistake with Stefan. Learn to never trust people so easily again, learn to get to know them better before stupidly believing I was in love with them. Learn to be strong, learn to be careful.

I gasped when I heard footsteps approaching, and wiping my cheeks with the back of my hand, I shot up and turned around to… a very wet, practically naked Damon grinning at me. My breath hitched in my throat, because yes, I was hurt, but I was still a woman. A very teenage-y, very hormonal woman.

"Like what you see?" he was more, or less gloating, and I hummed thoughtfully as I took his appearance fully in. A white towel was loosely wrapped around his waist, his feet were bare, and there were drops of water almost on every inch of his skin.

"Nothing I've never seen before," I lied through my teeth, shrugging to make my point a little more believable.

"Is that so?" Damon was standing in front of me in an instant, narrowing his eyes down at me, and reminding me of the first day I had met him. Who knew how close we would eventually get?

"Oh yeah. If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it." Damon chuckled, and scanned the room. His gaze stopped on the crumpled piece of paper. He looked at me, flaring his nostrils, and then groaned.

"You have read it, haven't you?" Damon scoffed "Women. Snoopy little things." I just stared at him, at a loss for words. " Oh no. Don't look at me like that. I don't need your pity." I shook my head lightly.

"It's not pity. It's...understanding. Stefan and Katherine… They both did the same thing. They used us. I just… I… We will get through this." _We will get through this_, I repeated in my mind. I needed to believe it, too. I needed him to agree. I might have sounded all strong and sure of myself, but inside, I was as weak as he was. I didn't just need him to need me. I needed him, as well. "Right?" Somehow, my resolve crumbled and I ended up questioning him about what I had wanted to pass onto him in the first place. In response Damon just looked confused.

"Huh?"

"Damon," it almost came out with a question-mark. I couldn't help it, his eyes were so cold, and distant. He couldn't push me away. He couldn't. "We will get through this," I repeated firmly, and with that I wrapped my arms around his waist. Not that he wasn't strong enough to kick me out of his house, and out of his life. But in that moment, I just felt like holding onto him, and never letting go. He stiffened at first, and my insides clenched at the idea that perhaps I had been wrong. Perhaps I didn't know him as well as I thought. Perhaps he didn't want us to fight this together.

But then his arms closed around my body, firmly enough to make me feel safe. Firmly enough to make me feel that I wasn't alone, that not everyone had abandoned me. I sighed, and it was shaky, and weak, but I didn't mind.

"We will," he whispered in my ear, and I nodded. We were in this together. And I wouldn't even try to explain the warm feeling that had settled in my heart.

* * *

><p>Later that night, when I walked into the kitchen to drink some water, I found Jenna already there, working on her laptop. "Hey," she said hesitantly, and I nodded at her general direction. I was exhausted from the cleaning spree at the Salvatore house, but I was also fed up from the repeated silences between the two of us. I couldn't take it any longer.<p>

"Why didn't you tell me, Jenna?" I blurted out. Jenna closed the laptop, and sat up straighter.

"Your mom was going to do it eventually," she replied in a small voice, crossing her arms in front of her chest "I'd never thought I'd had to."

"If my mom were here right now, and I asked, she'd tell me the truth." She knew I wasn't lying, and she knew it was the right thing to do.

"Your dad was about to leave the office one night, when this girl showed up. She was sixteen, a runaway, and about to give birth. He delivered her baby, and he gave her a place to stay, but a few days later she disappeared. And there you were," she said motioning at me "Your parents were trying so hard to have a baby, it just wasn't happening. All Miranda ever wanted was to be a mom."

"Well, why were my parents' names on the birth certificate?" I asked confused.

"Your dad was a doctor, Elena," she replied matter-of-factly "he took care of it. They didn't want to lose you, so they kept it quiet, told as few people as possible. But if anyone ever wanted proof, they had documentation."

"What else do you know about her? The girl?" I had so many questions. How could I ever find out more about this girl, about my birth-mother? Why would she give me up? Where was she today? Did she ever have any more kids?

"Just her name, Isobel."

"Isobel," I repeated experimentally. _Isobel_. The name of the woman that carried me for nine months. The name of the woman that brought me to this world.

"I could do some digging, that's if you want me to," Jenna suggested.

"Would you do that?" I asked excitedly, because truth be told, I would have no idea where to start at.

"It's the least I can do."

"Thanks," I said offering her a small smile "I think I'm going to get some sleep now. It was a long day." A long day, that had ended up being rather nice.

"Okay, goodnight."

"Goodnight, Jenna."

* * *

><p>The next days passed by in a blur. My life seemed to be falling into a routine. I would wake up every morning, go to school, try to get Bonnie to talk to me again, spend the evening with Damon, or with Caroline at the Grill, and then drive back home, and sleep like the dead. I had started warming up again towards Jenna, because I realized that this mustn't have been easy on her, either. She practically had to grow up in a day, and be a parent for myself and Jeremy, when she was supposed to be nothing but a carefree college student. She found herself suddenly responsible for two other people, and for taking care of an entire household. It was a lot on her. She wasn't the one who was supposed to have talked to me about this issue, anyway.<p>

I still hadn't gathered the courage to talk to Jeremy, though. Our relationship had been bumpy ever since the funeral, and now this whole adoption thing? I doubted it would win us the best-siblings award.

"Are you leaving?" I asked, looking up from the magazine I was reading, when Jeremy ran downstairs.

"I'm meeting a friend at the Grill," he grumbled, waving at me, and then disappearing down the corridor.

"Someone I know?" I questioned, making him stop on his tracks.

"No," his tone wasn't a happy one. "Anna is new in town. Are we done with twenty questions now?"

I wanted to apologize, explain to him that I was just trying to be friendly, not nosy. But Jeremy fled the house, slamming the door behind him, and making me wince.

"You haven't talked to him, yet?" I jolted in surprise, when I found Damon sitting next to me.

"Will you stop doing that?" I complained, hitting him playfully on the arm.

"Doing what?" he asked, grabbing the magazine from my hands, and glancing at the article I had been reading "I didn't know you were interested in the theory of multiverse."

"And I didn't know you were interested in giving me a heart attack! Stop sneaking up on me!" I explained, snatching it back, and throwing it on the coffee table "And no, I haven't talked to him, yet."

"Why not?"

"I don't know how he'll react."

"See, Elena, that is exactly your problem!"

"Okay, Sigmund, let's hear it. What's my problem?" I demanded, raising my eyebrows expectantly.

"Well, Sigmund would probably say your issues lie in your pent-up sexuality… but me? I say you're thinking way too much," he breathed resting his hand on my shoulder "You should be a Lindsay Lohan, not an Angela Lansbury. Loosen up a little, live your life."

"You know that's not how I am, Damon! I can't do that," I said in a small voice.

"Sure you can! Come on, I'll show you. Close your eyes." I raised an eyebrow.

"Why?" He made a face and shushed me.

"Just do it." I shrugged, and did as he asked. "Now, I'm going to ask you a couple of questions, and you just answer with the first thing that pops up in your mind."

"Ok..." Where was he going with this?

"Sunrise, or sunset?

"Sunset."

"Cheerios, or Lucky Charms?"

"Cheerios." Damon scoffed playfully.

"Boring. Do you like Calculus?"

"Nope."

"At least you're not a nerd. What is the thing you want to do most?"

"Get out of this town," I whispered, before I had the time to control myself. "Oh."

"Perfect! Tomorrow, you, and me are driving to Georgia."

"What? No!" I screamed "we can't do this."

"Why?"

"Because…"

"Oh shut up. You need a time-out. Trust me, your problems will still be here, when you come back home. Look, just step away from your life for five minutes. That's all I'm asking, five minutes."

"This is a bad idea," I murmured shaking my head from side to side, wondering how the hell he had managed to persuade me.

"I'll take that as a yes," he said, with an ear-to-ear grin "I'll pick you up tomorrow morning at nine thirty!"

* * *

><p><strong>P.S. A big 'thank you' goes to my awesome beta Grace4Delena . <strong>

**You can follow me on twitter: ts_eirini**


	5. There and back again

**Disclaimer: I don't own TVD, even though I'd love to!**

* * *

><p>Elena's Point Of View<p>

The drilling sound of my alarm going off the next morning made me sit up on the bed abruptly. I groaned in disappointment as the bright sunlight warmed up my face. It was the first time after many days that I was having a nice dream, something about summer vacation in Hawaii, and a handsome man playing beach volley. It was a shame I had woken up before I had the time to catch a glimpse of his face. It would have definitely been a beautiful one. Sighing, I pushed the covers off me, and walked to the bathroom. After taking a shower, and getting dressed for the day, I realized I had just enough time to grab a bite, before leaving for Georgia. I rolled my eyes as I remembered my conversation with Damon the previous night. He had been sneaky. He somehow made me confess that I wanted a break, and persuade me to actually take it. But still, I couldn't feel mad. Not really. Because it _was_ what I needed; a few hours away from everything, just to enjoy myself, recharge my batteries, and all that. And I would be with Damon. Which by definition meant it would be a more than funny trip. I couldn't help but frown in confusion, when I heard voices coming from downstairs. Who would be awake this early in the morning? Both Jeremy, and Jenna never get out of their bedrooms before midday during weekends.

"Good morning, Elena," a soft voice called before I was even inside the kitchen. I knew that voice. Yeap, I definitely did. But it wasn't supposed to be coming from my kitchen at 8.45 in the morning.

"Damon?" I asked puzzled "what are you doing here?" He was comfortably moving around, a towel thrown over his shoulder. Jenna was perched on the counter, holding a cup of coffee in her hands, and smiling. It was like I had walked straight into a TV commercial.

"We're making breakfast!" Damon replied handing me a cup of coffee, too. I raised an eyebrow in Jenna's direction, but she just shrugged her shoulders, like it was no big deal. Right. Damon had always been a part of the family. Why not have him make us breakfast on this sunny Saturday?

"Okay," I mumbled, my growling stomach keeping me from pressing for more information. The moment I sat down on a chair, Damon placed a plate with pancakes, and a glass of orange juice in front of me. I spent the next few minutes enjoying the unbelievably tasty miracle that Damon had created, and listening to their conversation. I was astonished at his good behavior, at the interest he showed in Jenna's studies. Normally he chose to act like a jerk towards... well, mostly everyone. Unless he wanted something.

"So, what's on today's schedule?" Jenna asked, addressing me for the first time since I'd walked into the room.

"We're actually thinking of going to Georgia…" I said hesitantly, just in that moment remembering that I had never asked for her permission. Would she mind? Judging from the wink she gave me when Damon turned around to clean the counter, no, she didn't mind. She approved. Very much so.

"Georgia, huh? And when will you be back?"

"I have no idea. Damon?"

Damon wiped his hands on the towel, slowly. "It's not exactly the city's park, it _is_ Georgia, meaning several miles away," he said matter-of-factly. "So, definitely not before midnight."

"Midnight?" Jenna murmured "I don't want you driving in the middle of the night. Why don't you just stay there?" she suggested, and I chocked on my last bite. Damon chuckled at my reaction.

"Stay the night?" I repeated, and Jenna rolled her eyes.

"Well, it is the twenty-first century! And you two have been spending a lot of time together, anyway. Separate beds," she added more sternly, pointing her index finger at Damon, and he rolled his eyes in amusement.

"Don't worry, Jenna. I am not going to molest your underage niece. Cross my heart."

"That's good to know," I commented under my breath. "Thanks for making breakfast, Damon, it was delicious." I stood up, and made a move to grab the plate and glass, but he was faster, and picked them up instead.

"Why don't you go get your stuff, while I'm cleaning these up?"

When I walked back downstairs, carrying a bag with a few clothes, and toiletries, I found Damon helping Jenna put on her jacket, and I swear she was blushing. This was almost embarrassing.

"I'll take that to the car," he offered after he was done, and taking the bag from my hands, disappeared in the yard.

"He's so hot," Jenna whispered leaning closer to me, as soon as we were alone "I don't understand why you even started dating Stefan, when you could be with this man. God, he's amazing."

"Jenna, we're just friends," I said laughing. Because we might have been alone into the house, but I was willing to bet that Damon was leaning against his Camaro, smirking as he listened in on us talking.

"How can you ever be _just friends_ with this creature, Elena? He's not only hot, he has manners, and knows how to treat a woman, he is an excellent cook, and he has these long fingers," my eyes widened. Why was Jenna putting these images in my head? And anyway, it just felt wrong hearing her talking about _this_, and about this _and_ Damon! "just imagine what he can d.."

"Enough!" I screamed making her stop babbling. She bit down on her lip, as she stared at me apologetically.

"Ooops, I guess I shouldn't be saying these things when you're about to spend the night alone in a room with him," her smile faded, and she threw her hair behind her shoulder before taking a deep breath. Typical procedure. _Here comes the responsible guardian's speech._ I fought back my grin.

"Have a great time, _but_ stay off alcohol, drugs, and…" she trailed, her nose wrinkling in indecision "and stay off Damon."

"Will do, Aunt Jenna," I giggled, hugging her tightly.

From the moment I got into Damon's car, I could feel his eyes burning through me, but I refused to meet his gaze. His ego was big enough already, he really didn't need us stroking it further. And Jenna's praising words had definitely boosted up his self-esteem.

"Shut up," I barked out, putting on the seat-belt.

"Not a word came out of my mouth, 'lena. I think you're hearing things," Damon replied cheekily.

This was for sure going to be an interesting weekend.

* * *

><p>I could feel my surroundings spinning around wildly, as I entered the bedroom, and almost blindly made my way to the bed.<p>

"How are you feeling?" Damon asked, as I plopped down on the mattress, jacket, shoes, and all.

"Horrible," I groaned "but I'll be better. After I get some sleep."

"Sleep? But that's going to take you hours!" Damon whined, and I sighed in frustration.

"Not even sun is running on endless power, Damon. Why should humans?"

"But you're not fun, when you're asleep," he complained, and I opened my eyes to glare at him.

"Sorry for being human?" I asked in disbelief, and he shrugged dramatically.

"I forgive you."

"I'm sure you'll find something to keep you occupied while I'm off to dreamland, anyway," I murmured, kicking off my sneakers, and slipping under the covers. I almost moaned in relief when my head touched the pillows, and the warmth of the blanket engulfed me.

"Are you trying to kick me out?"

"You were the one who said I'm boring when I'm asleep!" I exclaimed, and he shook his head.

"I am also the one paying for this room. Don't I get any perks?"

"Like choosing when I can get some rest?" he nodded "No, you don't. And I told you I could pay, too, Damon, and you were furious about me even thinking of it."

"Right," he muttered under his breath. "Go ahead, get your beauty sleep, Elena. I wouldn't want you to look like the old lady from Titanic, in a couple of years," he added sarcastically, and got out of the room, banging the door behind him. It took me literally less than a minute to fall asleep.

It could have been seconds, or hours later, when I felt someone tugging at my leg. I groaned, and ducked my head under the covers. I wasn't done sleeping, yet. Perhaps in a century I would be ready to crawl back to my life.

"Get off me," I whispered. Damon wouldn't have any of that.

"Elena, wake up," his hands were instantly on the top of the blanket, pulling it down, and away from my face. I fought back determinedly.

"No."

"Come on, you've been sleeping for three hours. I'm bored!" Damon complained, and I almost laughed, since I was 99% sure that he was pouting. God, I knew him too well. When had that happened?

"Go away," I whimpered, hoping he'd let me get away with my request this time. But nope, of course not. This was Damon.

"You asked for it," he said, and before I had enough time to imagine what he could possibly be talking about, the covers were tossed onto the side, and the mattress sank from the weight of his body.

"What ar…" I started asking hesitantly, but the words died, when Damon started fumbling with my hair, trying to get it out of his way. Uh-oh. Even in my half-conscious state I could tell this wasn't good. Planting my elbows down, I attempted to slid away as fast as I could. Well, guess what! I didn't make it! A gasp escaped me when Damon reached inside my shirt, causing the most nightmarish chilly sensation to spread through my body, starting from my back. I couldn't help but shriek in terror, and then I was on my knees, probably looking extremely ridiculous as I struggled to remove the source of my discomfort. Whatever it was.

"Damn you, Damon," I growled through gritted teeth, teeth that would surely start clattering any moment now. I glowered at him as he sat up next to me, grinning. "Oh, you think this is funny, don't you?" Damon shrugged his shoulders.

"Funnier than watching you drool all over your pillow."

"I don't drool," I snapped, finally tossing the –did he really just put ice cubes in my shirt- away, and shuddering. Ice cubes. Really? What were we? Twelve? I felt like I had skinny dipped in the Potomac in the days of the blackbird. He was so going to regret it. But later. When I was feeling warm again. My plan was to get under the sheets and lie there for as long as possible, but I had to put it on hold. Because the next time I looked up to where Damon had been mere moments ago, he was nowhere to be found.

"Damon?" I called out quietly. Silence. I hated that silence. He was in a mood. And he was using ice on me. No, no. This silence was super b-

"Ahhh," I yelped in surprise when cold water splashed all over my arms and part of my face. I breathed heavily as I raised my hand to wipe my trembling chin.

"That was uncalled for," I muttered glaring at the now empty glass in his hands.

"If you hadn't been sleeping like the dead, I wouldn't have tried to turn you into the Abominable Snowman."

"What? The ice-cubes weren't enough?" Damon smirked and turned around.

"The ice was to wake you up. The water to make sure you wouldn't go back to bed. Which it did. So, mission accomplished."

"You're mean, you know that?" I asked as Damon removed his jacket and dropped it on a nearby chair.

"Always gets the work done, though," he wiggled his eyebrows "You should take a page from my book!"

A tiny smile formed on my lips as he hunched over his suitcase, probably in search of a fresh set of clothes.

"Yeah, maybe I should," I whispered, picking up the still half solid cubes from the bed, and as quietly as I could jumping off the bed and running towards him. My fingertips had just made contact with the smooth material of his shirt, when he swirled around, twisting my arm so that my palm was near my neck, the cold radiating towards my skin.

"Don't ever try that again," he whispered threateningly into my ear, the caress of his warm lips accompanied with the coldness of the ice doing weird tricks on me. I gulped down. I had been freezing moments ago, why did I feel on fire now?

"Or what?" I challenged him as he pulled back, and stared down at me with those bright blue eyes. His face instantly started changing, in response. I gasped, and my hand dropped to the side, the ice falling on the carpet. My breath hitched on my throat, when blood rushed to his eyes turning them red, and thin black veins protruded around them. He smirked, his typical everyday smirk, but this time it was adorned by a pair of fangs.

Why wasn't I scared? Why was I intrigued? Why did I find him oddly handsome like this?

"Are you afraid of me?" he murmured quietly, lightly tracing a line from my neck to the neckline of my shirt. My heart skipped a beat at the contact, and I swear there were goosebumps rising on my skin. My wet shirt. Yes, of course. It was clinging on me, and freezing me. Sure, why else would I be shivering in that moment? I shook my head from side to side. "Then why are you shaking?"

Why was I shaking? Was I shaking?

"Because I'm… I'm cold," I stuttered, and then, with a short smile Damon shifted back into his human form, our connection breaking, my mind regaining its normal function again.

"Does it hurt?" I blurted out the first question that formed in my brain, while he walked in the direction of the bathroom.

"Does what hurt?" he shot back in confusion, glancing at me over his shoulder, as he opened the door.

"When your fangs grow…" Damon stopped, licking his lips, and shrugged indifferently.

"Does it hurt when you blink?" I just looked at him. Of course he would deflect. What was I expecting? This was Damon.

"Come on, we don't have all day! Get moving! We're leaving in five minutes! Chop chop!"

* * *

><p>About twenty minutes later Damon parked his blue Camaro in front of a bar.<p>

"You brought me to a bar?" I asked him incredulously "I'm not even old enough, they're not going to let me in."

"Sure they will," he replied getting out, and heading towards the entrance. I huffed in annoyance, straightening my jacket, and all but running to catch up with him. By the time I was finally walking by his side, we were already inside, and I took a moment to glance around the room. The bar wasn't anything special, really. It was way smaller than the Grill, but rather well-kept. It wasn't crammed, but then again, it was only 5 in the afternoon.

"So, this is your girl." I turned around to spot the person who'd spoken. From the other side of the bar, a tall, dark-skinned woman grinned in my direction. Her hair was long, and falling on her back in thick curls. "I'm Bree," she introduced herself as we sat down on the stools.

"I'm…"

"Elena, I know," she continued, catching me off guard. I raised an eyebrow in shock. Know? Know how? "Damon was here earlier, and told me all about you," she explained, and I nodded in understanding.

"Yes, while you were ignoring me," Damon said leaning closer to me, and I sighed in frustration. This again?

"I was sleeping."

"You were still ignoring me."

"Yeah, whatever," I murmured, flipping through the menu. I was starving, which shouldn't exactly come as a surprise, given that I hadn't eaten for more than seven hours.

Bree quickly brought us our orders, and as I watched Damon munching on his fries, a question popped into my head. Wasn't everything in their bodies supposed to have frozen?

"How can you even eat? If technically you're supposed to be…"

"Dead?" Damon finished my sentence "it's not such a bad word. As long as I keep a healthy diet of blood in my system, my body functions pretty normally." Huh. It made sense. As much as vampire physiology could, anyway.

"You're not feeding on humans anymore, right?" Yes, I'd seen him draining those blood bags, hell, I'd carried them from the fridge myself. But I needed a more solid confirmation.

"No, but if you're offering to tap a vein…" he replied smirking, and I fixed him with a serious look. We had already been through this. There was no way I was going to offer him my blood. I wasn't dinner.

"I only drink from blood bags now," he eventually admitted, looking away. "It's not the same as fresh blood, but it's cooler than animal blood. I would _never_ do animal blood." He visibly shuddered, as if the mere idea disgusted him. Which it probably did.

"Why did you change your… eating habits?" I asked taking the pickles off my burger. Back when he had first come into town he was all into feeding from humans. What could have possibly made him change his mind?

"I'm going to stay in Mystic Falls for a little while. I definitely don't need the Founder's council picking up their pitchforks and coming after me."

"Why are you staying?"

"Do you want me to leave?" he shot back, staring deep into my eyes. God, those eyes. Why were they so blue?

"I didn't say that. I just asked why you decided to stay. I mean, you came back to get Katherine out of the tomb, and now you know that it's not going to happen, and I'm not even sure you actually want to see Katherine anymore, so I can't help but wonder what your new plan is."

"I thought we agreed you wouldn't use your brain today," he said pointedly, before glancing down at my plate. "What's wrong with you? You don't like pickles?" Nope, he wasn't dodging my question, not at all.

"Here you go, honey," Bree murmured, placing a bottle of beer in front of Damon.

"Thank you."

"I'll have one, too," I called out loudly, making her span around to look at me weirdly. Well, she wasn't the only one.

Damon was also staring at me, a dumbstruck expression on his face. Wasn't it only a week ago that we had spent the night drinking half of his alcohol stash?

"Time out, for five minutes, remember?" If I was supposed to relax and have a great time, what better way to start the evening than with a nice cold drink? "Yeah, well, that five minutes are going to need a beer."

* * *

><p>"What is it Damon? Do you need a bib?" I asked, giggling uncontrollably, as he wiped away the liquid that had dripped down his chin.<p>

"Sorry I can't unhinge my jaw like a _snake_ to consume alcohol," he replied, sarcasm coloring his voice. Normally, I would have come up with a clever remark of my own. But at the moment I was too drunk for that. Who cared that Damon had had the last word? Let him have it. We were having fun and that was all that mattered.

"Whatever," I shrugged him away "who's next? Another round, Bree!"

"Honey, you should be on the floor," the somewhat tipsy barwoman commented. Well, I did feel like bragging about that a little bit.

"I am not even drunk, my tolerance is like way up here," I said jumping up to make my point more clearer. A sudden spell of dizziness hit me, then, but I didn't let it worry me. I couldn't even remember the last time I had had laughed so much, and if I tried to do anything reckless, Damon would stop me. Or at least I hoped he would.

"Your cell phone is ringing," a young girl, a Jessica I think, told me. I searched into my pockets for a while until I was able to locate it. Ha!

"Hello?"

"Elena?"

"Jenna!" I cried out happily, frowning when I realized I couldn't make out what she was saying from the lyrics of the song that was currently sounding through the speakers. "Hold on, it's too loud in here."

"Elena? Where are you, are you okay?"

"Huh? Yeah, no, I'm good," I mumbled as I stumbled my way out of the bar "hold on, I can't hear you." After successfully making it out of the back door, though, I managed to trip over my own feet, and fall on the wooden floor. Neat, Elena. Groaning, I stood up again, rubbing my aching knee with one hand, and bringing the phone back to my ear with the other one.

"Hello?" was all I managed to say, before someone grabbed me from behind, and started dragging me away, fingers clasped over my mouth in case I considered screaming. I struggled against the strong grip, the adrenaline that was pulsing through my veins washing out the effects of alcohol quicker than I had ever thought possible. The chest pressed against my back was flat… a man, then. My gaze moved around the place frantically, trying to figure out where he was taking me. To a car, probably? I gasped in shock, and a little pain, too, when I was suddenly pushed against a wall, face first. Surprisingly, I managed to throw my arms forward quickly enough, and I didn't smash my nose against the concrete. I turned around, bracing myself to face my captor, but… there was no one there.

"What the hell is this? What do you want from me?" I yelled in the empty space, all of my senses on the alert. Why couldn't I see him? Why couldn't I hear him?

"I want nothing from you," a male voice said from my right side, making me jump out of my skin. My chest moved up, and down rapidly as I took in his appearance. He was tall, and brown-haired, nothing distinctive about him. "It's him I want."

"Him? Him, who? Damon…" I breathed the answer to my own question, my eyes widening in fear.

"I really don't want to hurt you. So, just stay here, and be quiet," the man instructed me, once again quietly slipping into the shadows. I stood there perplexed, until I heard footsteps approaching. My breath hitched in my throat. _Damon_.

"Damon, no," I screamed as he appeared in my line of view, and then the man from before, was standing in front of him. He moved so fast that my human eyes were barely able to follow the wooden board as it connected with Damon's knees. I winced at his scream.

"What the hell?" Damon uttered in shock as he collapsed on the ground. The man dropped out of sight for a split second, and then came back carrying a barrel of gasoline, which he hastily spilt on Damon. Was he going to burn him? I felt like shrieking. No, he couldn't do that. My feet moved almost on their own accord, and I ran towards them, not even stopping to think of the danger I was putting myself in. A gasp escaped my lips when the man turned around, and growled at me threateningly, his fangs bared. Vampire. Of course. I should have known.

"Who are you?" Damon asked in a weak voice.

"That's perfect, you have no idea," he spat out, straightening out his jacket.

"What are you talking about? What did he do?" I asked, taking small steps forward.

"He killed my girlfriend," he said through gritted teeth "What did she do to you, huh? What did she do to you?" Another blow. This time on the calves.

"Nothing," Damon answered quietly. Who were they talking about? What was going on?

"I don't understand," I exclaimed. This couldn't be happening. What could I do? How could I help Damon out of this nasty situation?

"My girlfriend went to visit Stefan, and he killed her. Got it?" My shoulders dropped as realization hit me. Yes, got it now.

"Lexi? Lexi was your girlfriend? She told me about you. She said you were human."

"I was," he whispered, his head hanging low. I was getting at him. He was making conversation. Maybe I could make him see reason. Killing Damon wouldn't bring Lexi back, and I _had_ to help Damon.

"Lexi turned you?" I pressed, cursing mentally, when I noticed that he had taken a box of matches out of his pocket.

"If you want to be with someone forever, you have to live forever." When Damon tried to sit up, the man kicked him hard, and I almost cringed in pain, too.

"She loved you," I was no longer aware of what I was saying, I was just speaking the first thing that was coming into my mind, hoping that it would be enough to change his decision. Something had to affect him. Anything. Anything. "She said 'when it's real, you can't walk away'."

"Well, that's a decision that you're not going to have to make," he said glaring at me. What?

"Don't, don't, please don't hurt him…" He couldn't kill Damon.

"I'm doing you a favour," the man whispered. Tears gathered in my eyes, as I saw him lightening up a match. This was it. I had to make it. If I failed, Damon would… I couldn't even think about it.

"Lexi loved you," I said in a trembling voice, silently praying to God for some help "and she was good. That means you're good, too. Be better than him. Don't do this, I'm begging you, please."

He stared at me blankly for a few seconds. Was he pitying me? Deciding whether he'd kill me, too? And then the match fell from his hands, and I could breathe again. Damon was going to be okay. I watched closely as he leaned down, grabbing Damon by the collar of his shirt, and sending him flying to the door of one of the surrounding buildings.

"Thank you," I muttered in relief.

"It wasn't for you," the vampire blurted out, and ran away. But I didn't care about the meaning behind his words. There was only one concern in my mind. Only one. Damon.

He was lying with his face pressed on the ground, his jean-clad legs covered with blood, and his whole body wet from the petrol.

"Damon, can you stand up? Come on," I whispered, and rolled him over. He groaned in discomfort, and I heard him taking a sharp breath. Wincing in the entire process, he managed to push himself up, and I quickly threw my right arm around his waist, in case he needed my support. A few minutes later, we finally made it to his car. I made a move to fish the keys out of his pocket, but he slapped my hand away.

"No way," he whispered, clearly struggling in doing just that. Men.

"Damon, stop being an idiot and give me the keys," I put my hand in front of his chest, palm up.

"You're not driving her." Her? This couldn't be happening. He probably had an internal bleeding that made him worry over a stupid car!

"Damon, give me the keys. I do have a licence!"

"Did you find it in your All Brans?" I made a face, but his head was practically dangling from his neck, and I doubt he saw it. Stupid, stupid, stubborn vampire! That was it.

"You know what? You think you're fine? Okay. Open the door and get yourself in." I disentangled myself from him, and Damon unceremoniously fell against the blue car.

"OW!" He yelped in pain, and then he just stood there, breathing heavily, and rubbing his waist.

I left him to his misery for a few seconds, before approaching him once more. I grabbed his arm once again, so that he could hold onto me. The fact alone that he did, suggested that he was actually agreeing with me. Finally. I slowly walked him to the passenger's side of the car and helped him in the seat.

"I'm going to get our stuff from the bar. I'll be back in a minute," I murmured, and he nodded slightly.

I hurriedly walked into the building, ignoring the loud music, and grabbed our jackets from the bar stools.

"Where is Damon?" Bree asked, appearing behind me, and I inhaled before turning to face her. "He's waiting for me at the car, we… we have to go."

"He's alive?" My eyes locked with hers, and I saw fear, and rage in them.

"You know what happened," I stated, and she nodded.

"_I_ called Lee," she clarified.

"Wh..wh..why would you do that?"

"Lexi was my friend. How could he?" she exclaimed, her voice breaking, and tears pooling in her eyes. I all but groaned. This was so messed up. And it wasn't like there was any way to excuse Damon's decision to stake Lexi. It was a mistake.

"What Damon did was wrong," I said, putting on my jacket. "There's no doubt about that. And I am sure he has done a lot more horrible things over the years, that he has hurt plenty of people… but he's changed. He _is_ changing. I don't expect you to forgive him for killing Lexi, I can't do that either, and I only knew her for a few hours. But I'm asking that you give him a second chance. You'd be amazed at how good he can be when he wants to."

"Damon is not capable of kindness, my girl. What you see in him, is nothing but what he wants you to see, it's nothing but a very nice act. But it's not real. It's nowhere near real, so stop fooling yourself. You can't trust Damon. He will ruin your life. He will ruin you."

"That's where you're wrong," I replied calmly. I could see where she was coming from, but there was no doubt in my mind. Not anymore. "Damon isn't really a monster. He's doing a very good job in pretending to be one. But he can be so much better than that. If only we give him the chance."

With that I turned on my heels, my arms packed with our belongings and quickly got out of the bar. I didn't even have the time to process what Bree had told me, though, because upon glancing at the car, I saw Damon on the driver's seat, looking beat, but a tad better than five minutes ago.

"What are you doing?" I asked incredulously through the open window.

" Driving, since I'm feeling better," he replied calmly. I couldn't help but scowl. Sure, he was. "Oh, stop scowling. I'm a vampire, I heal. Now, hop in. Gasoline is a bitch to scrub off leather seats, and I'm dripping."

"Are you sure you're okay?" Damon rolled his eyes at this. I took that as a good sign. He was being himself. He was truly fine.

"Yes, Elena. Peachy keen. I'm not going to faint behind the well. Scout's honour."

* * *

><p>Later that night, I found myself lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling. I couldn't sleep. I was still too shaken, too terrified. Everything that had happened earlier that night was starting to sink in.<p>

I had always believed that the most scary thing would be having someone threaten you. When Lee had grabbed me, I was obviously frightened enough. I thought he could have been a drunk man, wanting to kidnap me, rape me, kill me, or all of the above. I didn't let myself get too panicked though, because I was sure that Damon would soon notice my absence, and come to my rescue. Everything changed, however, when I realised that Lee had used me to lure _Damon_ out. Damon would have been able to save me, but what could I ever do to protect him from a vampire? I was nothing more than a mere human.

I held back a sob, as the images of Damon lying on the ground, badly injured, passed in front of my eyes. It was at that moment that it dawned on me: I didn't want to lose Damon, I _couldn't_ lose Damon. After everything we'd been through together, all the fights, and the funny moments, the dancing, and the drinking, the screaming, and the joking… I couldn't deny that we had come very close. And even though a couple of weeks ago I would have cracked up at the thought… I could now trust him.

I turned my head around, and gazed at his face that was barely illuminated by the moonlight. There was a frown etched on his forehead that told me he was still in pain, and his lips were slightly parted. His chest was rising, and falling rhythmically, and my own was violently closing up, almost choking me. I cared about him.

Trying not to make too much noise, I inched closer to him, and placed a small kiss on his cheek. My lips lingered on his skin, revelling in the warmth radiating off him. It was probably wrong. But it was late. And he was asleep. He would never know.

"I thought I'd lose you tonight," I whispered "Don't you dare scare me like that again. I can't afford losing you, Damon, not anymore," I concluded, as a single tear ran down my cheek. I wiped it off with the back of my hand, and rested my head on his chest. I just needed to hear his heartbeat for a moment. I needed to know that he was alive. That was what I told myself. I would move back to my side of the bed before I fell asleep. That's what I told myself.

* * *

><p>Before I even opened my eyes, I was aware of a set of strong arms wrapped around my body. I smiled broadly. It felt nice. Looking up, my eyes met Damon's blue ones.<p>

"Good morning," I breathed quietly.

"Rise and shine, sleepy head," he replied smirking "So, have I passed the pillow test?"

"No, not really, pillows are supposed to be soft, you know," I muttered, poking his toned stomach.

"Well, you didn't seem to mind _that_ much. I tried to get out of the bed, earlier, and you just snuggled up closer."

"Comfortable or not, I don't like my pillows straying away," I joked "What time is it anyway?"

"A little past one," he replied with a sigh.

"Really?" I pushed the covers away, and threw my legs over the side of the bed.

"Yep. Some night, huh? Pretty wild, for a five minute break."

"I saved your life," I said proudly, choosing to look at the bright side of last night's events.

"I know."

"And don't you forget it," I advised him, and he rolled his eyes.

"Come on, now," he said standing up, as well "we need to get some breakfast, and get back on the road."

"Are you all right now?" I asked in a serious voice, following him with my eyes to make sure that he was walking properly, and without flinching in pain like yesterday.

"Yeah, I told you. Blood, sleep and I'm as good as new," he explained, moving towards his suitcase "I'm going to take a shower."

In the short time that Damon was in the bathroom, I changed into clean clothes, and placed the pyjamas back into my bag. When he walked back into the room, I was running a comb through my hair.

"I do remember Jenna mentioning something about separate beds," I murmured gazing at him through the mirror.

"What Jenna doesn't know, won't hurt her," he shrugged me away, picking up his jacket, and swiftly pushing his arms into the sleeves.

"Where are you going?" I asked, turning around alarmed. He had that determined look in his eyes. Which was never good.

"I have to take care of something."

"Take care of what?" I demanded.

"That freak didn't just happen to walk into the bar the day I was there, Elena! A little bird told him. And I happen to know what its name is. So, I am going to make sure it's not going to sing again," he said hurrying towards the door, but I blocked his way. His eyes were wide as he stared down at me.

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"You're not going to hurt her. You're not going to hurt Bree," I said in a firm voice.

"Elena, get the hell out of my way. He tried to _kill_ me. I am not going to sit here and do nothing about it!" he was starting to lose his patience.

"Lexi was her friend, Damon, and Bree feels hurt, and betrayed. I know that you're angry at her, but I won't let you do this. Please... I'm asking you to think clear, and let her be," he opened his mouth to protest, but I didn't give him the chance. I had another approach I wanted to try out. "Killing Lexi almost got you killed, Damon. Go ahead, kill Bree! What do you think is going to happen? Another friend of hers will want revenge on you! So, just don't hurt Bree, okay? Don't even go there."

He stared at me for some long seconds, his nostrils flaring. Was he annoyed? Had I persuaded him? What was he thinking?

"What?" I asked when the silence became too much for me to handle.

"I think you're enjoying saving my ass a little bit too much."

"Don't get me wrong, it was awesome," I replied, a smile spreading on my lips "but let's not make a habit out of it, okay?"

* * *

><p>"So, did you have a good time?" Damon asked, side-glancing at me, as he parked the car in front of my house.<p>

"I did," I replied honestly "thank you."

"And, you got to sleep with me. I mean, not many women can say that," he said smirking, and I hit him playfully on the arm.

"Right! Only the entire female population of North America and possibly Europe." Damon kept smirking and just shrugged.

"I'm a manwhore, what can I say? But the women that have literally just slept with me and, I'm saying that with a touch of disgust… cuddled, are just a handful."

"Shut up, I was just cold."

"Yeah, right, you were cold," he repeated, as I got out of the car, and grabbed my bag from the trunk. "I'll call you later," he breathed through the half open window, and I walked towards the house with a huge grin on my face.

"Looks like someone had a great time at the road trip," Jenna said suggestively, winking at me from the kitchen's entrance.

"That would be me!"

"Perfect! You're going to give me details over dinner. Now, can you come in here for a second?"

"Sure," I whispered, letting the bag fall on the ground, and following her into the room.

"Do you remember that I promised to do some digging about the adoption?" she asked turning on her laptop. I nodded. "Your dad kept everything from his medical practice- records, logs, old appointment books. I found an entry from the night you were born, patient, and a birth date. Isobel Peterson."

"Do you think that's her real name?"

"Pregnant teenage runaway? Probably not. First name, maybe. But where'd she get Peterson? Classmate? Best friend? So, I binged it," she trailed as she typed on the laptop "I searched for all the Petersons in this area, born the same year as Isobel. I found three, two men, and a woman, Trudie, who lived in Grove Hill Virginia."

"That's not far from here," I pointed out.

"Well, watch this," Jenna added pointing at the screen. I looked closer, and I saw a picture of two cheerleaders. The one was blond, the other one a brunette. Their names were printed below the photo. _Trudie Peterson, Isobel Flemming._

"Isobel," I breathed smiling "she was a cheerleader."

"Trudie still lives there. This is her address," Jenna added handing me a yellow post-it.

"What about Isobel?" She had to have found something for her, too. Right?

"I couldn't find anything about her," she replied looking away from me. I sighed in disappointment. Just my luck. I was about to stand up, and leave the room when she spoke again, this time a lot more hesitantly. "Listen, there's something more. Mr. Saltzman, Rick, his wife was from around here, and her name was also Isobel." Alaric? Had a wife named Isobel? _Had?_

"Wait, 'was' as in…"

"She died."

* * *

><p>Damon's Point Of View<p>

Vampires kill. Humans, witches, other vampires. Whatever. Someone else would say it's just in our DNA.

I rolled my eyes, as I wiped my hands on a towel, making sure that there was no blood left on my fingers. Wouldn't want to stain the seat on my trip back home.

Fancy words were never my thing.

Because fancy words aren't important.

Things are simple.

We need blood to survive. We need to see it, smell it, feel it on our hands and on our lips. We can't go on without it.

With a sigh, I leaned against the sink, and stared down at the motionless, heartless body. Yeah, heartless. And not in an Adolph Hitler kind of way. Bree and I had known each other for the best part of the last two decades.

We weren't exactly best friends. Not really. We hardly ever saw each other, but I'd say we were pretty close given our species.

The sight of her dead body was... strange. I could feel the guilt creeping up on me, crawling from my heart-ripping hand, on my spine and into my brain. I clenched my teeth together, and switched it off. No more guilt for me. And just like that, the corpse did nothing to me, anymore. It was nothing but a piece of bleeding meat laying on the floor.

Switching it off is always weird.

But Bree had gone behind my back. She had planned my murder. And I couldn't let her go away with that. Screw feelings and friendships. When someone tries to get you killed, you get him six feet under as fast as you can. That's the only way to survive.

I glanced around the empty bar for a last time, and picked up my jacket, throwing it over my shoulder on my way out.

I couldn't exactly blame Elena for wanting to change my mind. Everything she had said made perfect sense. It really did, and I could get it. As a human, I used to have different moral grounds, too. They were still buried deep in the back of my mind, and I just had to scratch the surface if I ever wanted to have a trip down memory lane. That was were the guilt came from. Stupid human morality slapping me in the face. But as a vampire, you have to adapt. Your brain re-programs, and everything gets a new, wider, more selfish perspective, and all is driven by one thing.

Survival.

And she couldn't get me.

Elena wouldn't get why I had to get rid of Bree.

You're only ever going to fully get that if you are a part of it.

There was also the pleasure I had taken in doing it. I hadn't killed in a very long time and contrarily to common belief, it's not that I want to do it. It's that I _need_ it. Normal people have therapy sessions and eat chocolate to relax. I am not a normal person. I am a vampire. I need the kill, and Bree was causing me trouble. This was basically me killing two birds with one stone. Pun kind of intended.

If Elena ever found out, she'd stomp her foot down, cross those arms and lecture me.

I got inside the car and chuckled.

She was just adorable, and she didn't even realize it. All worried about me, when I was...well, indestructible? Truth be told though, I liked her more when she was her teenager-y careless self. Laughing and joking. I definitely had a soft..._er_ spot for that Elena.

* * *

><p><strong>P.S. A big 'thank you' goes to my awesome beta Grace4Delena . She has been super patient with me! Do me a favor, and go read her one-shots! They will give you the <em>best<em> insight into the wonderful character that is Damon Salvatore. Go!**

**You can follow me on twitter: ts_eirini**


	6. The match in the powder barrel

**Thank you for all of the reviews, alerts, favorites!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own TVD, even though I'd love to!**

* * *

><p>I stood in front of the door, my heart beating frantically beneath my ribs. Did I really want to do this? Did I want to start digging into my birth mother's past? Of course I did. Regardless of what I would eventually find, I would at least know the truth. That was what really mattered. Right? Right. Taking a deep breath, I raised my hand, and rang the bell. Once. Twice. No one answered. All I could hear were my sharp breaths. No footsteps from the other side of the door. Absolutely nothing. Maybe this was a mistake, after all. Perhaps this was the universe's way of telling me that the past should stay in the past. That whatever reasons had made Isobel give me up, should never be found out by me. Shaking my head, as if that movement would help getting more oxygen into my brain, I turned around with every intention of walking back to my car, and driving home with music blurring through the speakers. I hadn't even taken a step, when the door opened behind me. I jolted in shock, and glancing over my shoulder, I saw that a blond woman was now standing at the doorstep. It wasn't hard to recognize her. She hadn't changed at all.<p>

"Trudie?" I whispered "Trudie Peterson?"

"Yes," she replied sweetly.

"Hmm, my name is Elena Gilbert," I said facing her, and nervously fiddling with the strap of my bag "I wanted to talk to you about… Isobel Flemming."

"Well, I haven't heard that name for years. How do you know her?"

"I think that I…"I inhaled deeply, struggling to find the correct words. Yes, I'd appeared at her house, but I hadn't exactly prepared a speech in case I actually found her. _Grow a pair and cut to the chase, Elena! _That's what Damon would say. "Do you know if she had a baby that she gave up for adoption?" I watched her closely as the smile fell from her lips, and her eyes widened. So, she knew. This was good.

"Oh, my God," she exclaimed breathlessly "you're her daughter." Her gaze travelled up, and down my body, examining me from head to toe, and then she smiled again, taking a step back into the house. "I was just gonna make some tea. Would you like some?" she asked, and I nodded.

"Sure."

"The kitchen's this way," she added, pointing at the right direction with her thumb, and I gave her a grateful nod, as I stepped inside the house.

And then, I was rambling like I often do when I'm nervous.

"I wasn't gonna come. I didn't think I was, but I was driving, and I hit this stoplight, and it made me think about when I was learning how to drive, and then my mom would always warn me about this blind turn on the left-hand side, and then I was thinking about my mom, and I had your address. I'm sorry for barging in," I apologised, making Trudie chuckle.

"It's no problem. Just a surprise, though. I haven't thought about Isobel in years," she murmured, sitting down on a chair. I followed her example, and settled down next to her.

"When was the last time you saw her?"

"About seventeen years ago, when she left to go have you. We kept in touch for a while, but, well, you know, people drift apart." I struggled not to be disappointed, but it wasn't easy. I had been hoping she would have recently contacted her. Recently being sometime over the last decade. I had been wrong.

"And you don't know where she ended up?"

"She was in Florida for a while," she nodded thoughtfully "She was on her own. I know it wasn't easy."

"Do you have any idea who my father is?" It was the question that had been bugging me for the last few days. Somewhere, my biological father existed. And someone, someone had to know who he was.

"I could never get her to fess up," she replied. But it was rushed, almost like she wanted this topic over. Like she was lying. "Anyway, she finally pulled it together, got into college on a scholarship."

"Where did she go?" I asked, choosing not to press her further. At least not in the moment.

"Somewhere in North Carolina, Duke, I think. Smart girl, smart school. Let me just grab the tea," with that she stood up, and left me alone in the room. I gazed around curiously. The house looked normal, nothing out of place, nothing fishy. But there was something about her behaviour. Even though at first she had seemed very kind, and nice, as the minutes went by, I could tell that she was getting nervous. She was answering my questions weirdly, and she was constantly glancing towards the window, whenever she thought I wasn't looking. Could she know more than she let on? And why would my mother's high school best friend want to keep something from me? It just didn't make sense.

When I heard her walking back into the dining room, I forced the smile back on my face, and prayed that my suspicions wouldn't show on my face.

"There you go," Trudie whispered, placing a tea-cup in front of me, and putting on the table a box that she had carried with her. She removed the lid, and spent a few seconds moving the contents around, clearly searching for something in particular. A small sigh escaped her lips before she handed me a photo, the same photo Jenna had managed to dig up on the Internet.

"They came to the games for us," she explained cheerfully. Clearly, this was a happy memory of her life. "The football team hadn't won in years. _We_ were the stars. Well, Izzie was, but I was a damn good backup." I laughed lightly, as I traced Isobel's face with my thumb. Where was this woman now? Was she okay?

"This is great, thank you," I murmured, handing it back. She carefully tucked it back inside, before pointedly staring at my still filled to the rim cup.

"You haven't touched your tea."

"Oh, yeah," somehow it had completely forgotten about that. Which was probably really rude on my part. It took me no more than a sip to recognise the unique flavour. When the familiar aroma hit my nostrils, there was no doubt anymore.

"What is this?" I asked innocently. Wondering how she'd handle the issue.

"Oh, it's just a herbal mixture," she answered, meticulously avoiding meeting my eyes. She wasn't a good liar.

"Vervain?" I demanded, almost huffing in frustration when she chose to remain silent "You know."

"Know what?" she exclaimed, still pretending to have no idea what I was talking about. Which was pretty lame. I wasn't stupid. And she wasn't smooth.

"You didn't invite me in, and you're serving vervain tea. You know," I concluded in a firm voice, wondering if she had been honest about anything at all.

"I think that you should probably leave," Trudie suddenly ordered, pushing her chair back, and glaring down at me.

"Wait," I breathed placing down the cup. I hadn't meant to make her so angry. I just wanted to get her to open up. Apparently, I had pushed too hard, too soon.

"Please leave. Now," she was almost screaming now, and gone was the friendly expression from her face. I quickly gathered up my stuff, and all but ran to the front door, not daring to say anything more, or even look behind.

_This was weird. So very weird,_ I thought to myself, as I made my way to the car. Trudie knew about vampires, and it was obvious that I knew, too. So, what was it that stopped her from telling me the truth? What _was_ the truth? And why would she know about vampires, anyway? How come all the people that I was somehow involved with had some sort of connection to the vampire world? I groaned loudly in confusion, as I opened the back door of the car and tossed my bag on the seat. As I walked to the driver's seat, though, something moved in my peripheral vision, something black, something that looked like a human. I span around panicked, my eyes narrowing as I took in the image of the man that was standing at the beginning of the road. I was certain he hadn't been there ten seconds ago. Our eyes locked, and he started walking towards me with wide steps. He could have been someone living in the neighbourhood just heading to his house, but after everything I'd been through, I couldn't help freaking out. Because he could also be someone dangerous. Someone I wouldn't be able to protect myself against. So, I hurriedly got into the car, and drove back to Mystic Falls faster than I normally would have.

* * *

><p>I was halfway home, when my cell phone started ringing. I sighed in disappointment, and glanced from the corner of my eye at the lit-up screen. <em>Jenna.<em> I took a deep breath as I turned down the volume of the radio, and parked by the side of the road.

"Elena?"

"Hey, Jenna! What's up?"

"Nothing, really, I just…," she cleared her throat uneasily. What? More bad news? What had I ever done to piss the gods above off so much? "I just…I found something out, and I thought you'd like to know."

"What now?" I huffed out. Did I have a long-lost twin sister?

"You know what? Maybe I should just wait for you to come home. You've been gone all day, you're probably tired, and-"

"Jenna, just spit it out," I begged, drumming my fingers against the steering wheel. I would find out this way, or another. At least if she told me now, I would get the time to process it, before having to interact with people.

"I showed Isobel's picture to Rick," there was a pause.

"And she was his wife, wasn't she?" it wasn't hard to guess. I mean… when had I ever been lucky?

"Yes."

"So, she's dead." My voice might have sounded all calm, and steady, but inside I was a mess. A mess off anger, and sadness, because I had foolishly hoped that I'd get to have another parent. A _living _parent. No one would ever be able to replace the two people that had brought me up, the two people that had showered me with love and care throughout all the years, but… but I was only seventeen years old. I still needed a parent around. Someone older. Someone I could lean on. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. It was stupid. And now I was hurt. Again. And this time, over a person that I had no memory of. Over a person that very possibly didn't even care about me.

"Elena, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, Jenna. I… I am okay. Thank you for helping me with this. I…. I got to go now, I'll see you soon."

"Elena…" I rolled down the window, allowing the fresh air to rush into the vehicle.

"Jenna, I'm fine," I breathed as convincingly as I could, and hang up.

I was a long way from fine, though.

And a long way from the only one person I needed to be with in that moment.

* * *

><p>Was I surprised when I attempted to knock on the front door of the Salvatore Mansion, only to watch the door give away, and open on its own? Yes, yes, I was surprised. But I was also scared. Last time this had happened, I'd found Damon in a horrible state. I doubted I could go through the same thing again. Especially that particular evening.<p>

"Damon?" I called out in confusion, as I stepped inside the hall, and made my way to the living room. The walls were glowing from the blazing fire that was burning in the fireplace. The same fire that was also casting scary shadows around me, making me want to run away, screaming. Preferably somewhere with a huge stock of alcohol. I raised an eyebrow in shock. Where had that come from? Damn, Damon was having too much of an influence on me. _Damon._

I carefully scanned the room, searching for anything out of place. From what I could see everything was fine; all the furniture in its place, no broken windows, no shattered glasses. I gasped when my gaze landed on a dark figure on the carpet right in front of the massive white fireplace. _No, no, no, no, no,_ I repeatedly chanted into my head, as I ran towards him, pain clenching my heart, my eyes welling with tears. How? Why? Who? I dropped on my knees next to him, turning him around, so that he was laying on his back.

"What the hell?" I exclaimed in bewilderment. This wasn't Damon, but Alaric Saltzman. My history teacher. My aunt's boyfriend. There was blood coming out of his chest, a wound was positioned right on top of his left lung. With trembling hands I searched for a pulse on his wrist, but there was none. He was dead.

I sat back on the floor, my head dropping in exhaustion on top of my bent knees. It was a puzzle, a puzzle that I couldn't solve. I couldn't come up with a single good reason why Rick would be at the Boarding house. Why he would be _dead_ at the Boarding House. What a crazy day. Everything was just so confusing, lately, how was I even supposed to understand any of it? How was I supposed to get the answers I wanted, and move on with my life? I sighed sadly, glancing at his still open eyes, and I shook my head in disappointment. He was probably the only one that could have talked to me about Isobel, and now he was dead.

"Elena?" my head snapped around at the sound of Damon's voice. He strolled into the room casually, as if everything about our merry little group was so normal. A vampire, a human, and a dead human. I'd had enough.

"What happened in here, Damon?"

"Good evening to you, too!" he smirked playfully.

"Why is Alaric dead?" I demanded, pushing myself off the floor, and approaching him.

"I generally don't respond well to threats, Elena. Surely you've figured that out by now. And random humans popping up into my house with a stake in their hands... yeah, that's still a threat in my book." I shook my head from side to side, finding it more than hard to believe that he was being like this.

"Stake? What Stake? Alaric is _dead,_ Damon! Dead!"

"Which means you're going to have a new history teacher. And while they fill the position up, maybe some free periods. Feel like thanking me, yet?" he winked.

"You've killed an innocent human! Don't you feel even a little bit of guilt?" I exclaimed, and he chuckled from the other side of the room.

"Guilt?" he considered it for a moment. "Nope, not at all. Listen, Elena, the guy wanted to know the truth. I gave him the truth, his wife didn't want him. It's not my fault he couldn't handle it." Okay. What?

"His wife… Isobel…" I mumbled under my breath "why would y-"

The words died in my throat when a loud gasp echoed through the room. My eyes widened considerably when I glanced down, only to find Alaric sitting up on the floor, coughing, with one hand clutched over his chest.

"You turned him?" I yelled, looking at Damon incredulously. Seriously?

"Why would I ever turn him? The guy is a pain in the ass," he replied in a matter-of-fact voice, crouching down to face Alaric. He growled quietly, and tried to slide away, but Damon was faster, gripping his shoulder tightly, and forcing him to stay put.

"Not exactly the time to play tough, mister. Why are you alive?"

"Damon, let go of him," I murmured, joining them on the floor, and lightly touching Alaric's forearm. He looked confusedly between me and Damon, still fighting to catch his breath.

"How are you feeling?" I asked gently.

"I feel fine," he managed to say, his fingers probing his chest.

"_How_ can you be fine?" Damon wondered aloud "I killed you, I saw you dead and bleeding over my carpet! Wasn't I persuasive enough? My bad! You were supposed to stay dead!"

"Damon is right," I whispered. The vampire raised an eyebrow at me, amused. Idiot. "Not about the staying dead thing, obviously, but... if you didn't have vampire blood in your system, there was no way you could have survived with that wound, Alaric." Alaric looked down on his hand, gently tracing the outline of a big ring I had never noticed before. What was with men and rings in this town?

"Isobel," he eventually breathed "the ring… the ring protected me," he added, as if that made any sense at all.

"That's… that's impossible," I commented. Even in this crazy supernatural world, how could a ring ever revive a person? With what power?

"I know," he whispered nodding his head.

"Well, this definitely calls for a drink," Damon announced, standing up and walking across the room.

"I can't be here, I need to leave," Alaric muttered, using a nearby sofa to get back on his feet.

"You aren't going anywhere. At least not alive." Damon growled threateningly, his eyes glowing angrily, even in the darkness of the room.

"You can't kill me, dick. I'll just keep coming back until I finally drive a stake through your dead heart."

"Correction: I can't kill you while you're wearing that tacky ring." He blurred in front of Alaric who bravely kept his ground. "Who's to say I won't take it off?"

"No one is leaving, and no one is dying," I said firmly, placing an arm between their bodies to make my point more clear. "I need to know what's going on here! Because, frankly, I don't get it."

"I didn't know you're still into bed time stories, Elena. But if that's your scene," Damon smiled, taking a step back and plopping down on the couch, even though his eyes never wandered away from Alaric. These two had serious issues. "Once upon a time, there was an annoying history teacher, let's call him… Ricky, with a really bad haircut, who moved into our very own Mystic Falls, with a diabolical plan. Find the funniest, sexiest vampire in the history of time, a real demon, and kill him. Poor thing. Ricky actually believed he stood a chance against him. The vampire killed Ricky with the same stake the teacher had tried to use on him. Ironic, huh? But the story does gets better! See, Mr. cocky history teacher somehow survived… and now the vampire gets to watch Ricky die all over again!"

"Wait, why would Alaric want to kill you?" I asked in confusion. He had just arrived in town.

"Because I saw him draining the life out of my wife," Alaric said in a grave voice, leaning against the wall. My breath caught in my throat, as I turned to glare at Damon.

"You did what?" I demanded through clenched teeth. Isobel was not only dead, but she'd been killed by Damon as well?

"See, that's what _I_ don't get! Why do you even care about him?" he yelled at me.

"Remember a few days ago, when we were talking about my birth mother, the one that gave me up, the one that sucks –as you so kindly put it?" he motioned for me to go on "Her name was Isobel. Alaric's Isobel," he sat up straighter on the sofa the moment the name fell from my lips. "Go ahead, reminisce about how you killed her," I spat out, as I felt tears running down my cheeks. I span on my heels and made a run for the door, no longer caring about stupid answers, and secrets of the past. I just wanted to be alone. I just wanted them all to leave me alone.

I had taken no more than five steps, when Damon was in front of me, blocking my way, and holding my arms. "Let go of me," I screamed, my fists pounding on his chest again and again, in hope that at some point I'd cause him as much pain as I was currently feeling. "Let go of me."

"Elena, I didn't kill her," I sniffed, my fingers twisting his black shirt, my jaw trembling. "She came to me. She wanted me to turn her."

"To… turn her? Into a vampire?" he nodded. "And you did?" I asked in a hoarse voice.

"I had no reason not to."

A deep frown formed on his forehead as the silence stretched between us. Then, his thumbs started rubbing in circles over my jacket. I hated myself for it, but his touch was soothing, even in a moment like this. Even when I'd just found out that he had turned my birth mother in a vampire. Why couldn't I be angry at him? He deserved for me to be angry at him, didn't he?

"I want to go home," I said looking him straight in the eye.

"Elena, I'm -"

"Damon, what part of I want to go home you _don't_ understand?" I had to get away from him. If I stayed there a little longer, I'd end up a weeping mess curled into his arms. But that wasn't right. That wasn't what my reaction was supposed to be like. Damon licked his lips, and then his expression hardened, his previously clear to me emotions now hidden beneath his mask. The mask that he hadn't used much lately. Not around me, anyway. He took a step back, and tilted his head towards the door.

"Go then."

"I'll drive you," Alaric offered, appearing by my side, and gently grasping my elbow. I moved away from his touch.

"I believe I can find the way to my own house."

* * *

><p>I entered the silent house, and not really bothering to turn on the lights, climbed up the stairs. I collapsed on my bed, my forehead pressed against the mattress. Tears streamed from my eyes and wet the sheets, while my sobs made my entire body shake. I wasn't crying for something in particular, really. But for everything that has been going on in my life during the last year.<p>

I turned on my side, and curled in fetal position, making my body as small as possible, hoping that I would succeed in making myself invisible, so that no more problems would come my way. A whimper escaped me, and I shut my eyes tightly, praying that when I would open them again, everything would be fine. I knew that it was pointless, though. You cannot escape your problems, even if you try to run away, they will always found you.

I hastily sat up, when I heard the front door opening, and closing. I wiped my face, and put my hair in a ponytail in a feeble effort to make myself presentable. Footsteps sounded coming up the stairs, and I forced a smile on my lips.

"Goodnight," Jeremy called not even bothering to look at me, slamming the door of his bedroom behind him. Then, he was turning the key, and officially locking himself away from me.

"Goodnight," I whispered back.

Fresh tears formed in my eyes. This was my brother. My little brother who used to come to my bed when he was scared at night. My little brother who'd grown into a teenager that wanted nothing to do with me. I was bad, wasn't I? I had driven him away with my over-protective attitude. I had screwed everything up. Maybe everything would have been better, maybe everyone's lives would be easier, if I had just died the night of the accident. If Stefan hadn't intervened, I would be dead now, perhaps I was _supposed_ to be dead after all.

* * *

><p>Sleep refused to come. I tossed and turned until the sheets were tangled around my legs, but it was pointless. I sighed in exhaustion, and rolled on my side, fixing my gaze on the white wall.<p>

I had reached a strange state of numbness. After many hours of crying, and thinking, I had finally realized that no matter how many tears I would shed, nothing would change. My problems wouldn't magically solve. My life wouldn't get any less complicated. But on the other hand, I didn't know if I could gather the strength to fight, either. It sounded horrible, and it probably was. But, I had lost my parents in a tragic accident, found out I was adopted, and discovered a supernatural world of witches, and vampires. I was only seventeen years old, and I was supposed to be excited about life. I was supposed to be pursuing my dreams, and not letting what life threw at me bring me down. And instead…

Could I get over all that?

I honestly didn't know if, and how.

Suddenly, the window flew open, and I sat up on the bed, my eyebrows drawn together in confusion. There was no wind outside, and I had actually double-checked that it was closed. Then, Damon was sitting on the window-seat, his elbows resting on his thighs, his eyes immediately finding mine.

"I'm tired, Damon," I whispered, dragging the covers higher up my body, and sitting up.

"Yeah, well, guess what. I couldn't sleep."

"Then, what are you doing here?"

"Peace offering?" he asked hopefully, raising a bottle high in the air for me to see. I chuckled. How come I hadn't seen him holding it before? Sneaky vampire.

"After everything that happened tonight, you came here with a bottle of wine?" I asked incredulously, and he shook his head negatively.

"No, I get that this is a special occasion. Wine wouldn't do it. Not in this case. This is from my private bourbon stock." I watched as he stood up, and climbed on the bed. "Mind you, I've never shared my bourbon before." He added, removing the lid, and staring at the bottle.

"Okay, so... " Damon raised his chin towards me, and then brought the bourbon to his lips, taking a large sip. He handed it to me, and I closed my eyes for a moment. How did he always know what I needed?

"Just out of curiosity…" I nodded, while swallowing a mouthful of the strong drink myself, trying my hardest not to choke. It burnt my throat, oh so delightfully. It was soothing, no kidding, but if I weren't careful, Damon would turn me into an alcoholic. "On a scale of one to ten, how much do you hate me right now?" He raised an eyebrow at me, playfully.

"How much do you think I hate you?" I shot back, barely refraining from chuckling. Damon shrugged his shoulders, as he settled back on the pillows.

"I wish I could tell you one hundred," I sighed, giving him the bottle back "because right now I want nothing more than to hate you, Damon. I _should_ hate you. That's what's normal, but… I can't."

"Mmm... Elena Gilbert, teenager extraordinaire." Damon muttered wiping his lips with the tips of his fingers. I couldn't decide if he was being honest, or sarcastic. He shrugged. "Everybody else hates me. It's the easiest thing to do." I looked at him harder then, taking in the details. His hair was ruffled, and not in his usual meticulously dishevelled sexy look. A couple of buttons on his shirt were undone, revealing the smooth alabaster skin that I'd only glimpsed at a few times. And his eyes were glistening. Not teasingly, but drunkenly. Had he been drinking the entire night?

"I had no idea," Damon mumbled a few moments later, and I inhaled deeply through my nose.

"I know you didn't. I guess that's why I am not pissed."

"Could have fooled me." And there was sadness in his voice. A sadness that I had never heard before. And the now empty bottle of bourbon was clutched between his hands.

"I am tired, Damon. I am tired of secrets, I'm tired of discovering weird connections between everyone. I'm tired. And I did just found out that you, my friend, turned my birth mother, who gave me up and never looked for me, into a vampire. That was too much for me," I fiddled with the end of my shirt's sleeve "and I need some time to accept that my life is always going to be a mess, or I won't ever be calm, nor happy."

"That's stupid, Elena! Take it from someone who's been around a long time: life isn't all rainbows, and unicorns. You lose a parent, and the other one hates your guts. You fall in love, and your heart is ripped out. You trust, and you are stabbed in the back. That's the drill. You just have to get used to it, and enjoy what you can while you can."

"For how long?" I asked almost inaudibly, and he shrugged.

"For as long as you live."

Tears gathered in my eyes, and I blinked rapidly, willing them away. They just rolled down my cheeks. I leaned forwards, burying my face in my hands.

"I don't have the strength to do it. I can't do it." The sheets rustled as Damon moved, and then his hand was resting on top of my spine. He didn't move it, he just left it there. I startled when he approached me even more, and whispered directly in my ear.

"Is this the part I oh-so-gently squeeze you in my warm embrace, and say we'll get through this together?" I chuckled through my tears, and pulled back to stare at him. Even now he could make me smile. "I'm sorry for… you know, turning your mother." He gave me a sad smile, and I nodded. It wasn't his fault. If Isobel had wanted it, if she had sought him out… it was all her choice. She was to blame for her own fate. Not Damon. He had just helped her get her wish. But why would she want to be a vampire? Why, when she was supposedly happily married to Alaric?

"What do you know about her?" I asked in a trembling voice, and his eyes widened.

"Not much. She was researching supernatural incidents, or something. It's not like I asked for a bio. She found me one night at a bar. I turned her a few hours later, spent a couple of days showing her the ropes. Then, forgot all about her. That's of course until Mr. Teacher became my shadow."

"How does Alaric know everything?" I questioned, and he rubbed his eyes.

"No idea. It's not like I had the time or the reason to chit-chat with the teacher tonight."

"You shouldn't have killed him," I said tentatively, carefully looking for his reaction.

"He's alive, isn't he?"

"Because of some strange ring, Damon," I rolled my eyes "If it wasn't for that, he would be dead."

"I am a vampire, Elena," he explained "I've got to fight to survive."

"Just, try not to ki-" I paused mid-sentence when I saw his eyebrow raising warningly.

"I should get to bed," I murmured, glancing at the clock on my night stand. "I've got school tomorrow."

"Yeah," Damon coughed, putting the bottle one the floor, and starting to stand up. My hand shot out instinctively, my fingers wrapped around his wrist, keeping him there, keeping him close. He glanced down questioningly, and then met my gaze.

"What?"

"You can stay if you want."

His lips parted in shock, and my eyes instinctively fell on them. They looked soft.

"Fine, but no snuggling this time," he warned and I chuckled.

"I think that deep down you're a sucker for PDAs, Damon."

"Say one more word, and I'm out of here."

I raised my palms defensively, and with a smile on my lips got back under the covers, and turned on my side to face him. He mirrored my position, one arm bent under his head to keep it propped up.

If sleep was hard to come before, now I felt my eyelids dropping as soon as my head touched the pillow.

"We're going to get through this. Together." He whispered, and I smiled, since it was the only reaction I could master at that point. To my great surprise, I realized that maybe I stood a chance. Perhaps I could be happy again. If I had someone in my life that would help me live, that would remind me of the things that matter whenever I felt down, someone that would make me feel safe, and loved. Someone like him. Someone like Damon. I sensed warm lips pressing on my forehead before I fell completely asleep, or it might have been just a dream, I couldn't know for sure.

* * *

><p><strong>P.S. A big 'thank you' goes to my awesome beta Grace4Delena . She has been super patient with me! Do me a favor, and go read her one-shots! They will give you the <em>best<em> insight into the wonderful character that is Damon Salvatore. Go!**

**You can follow me on twitter: ts_eirini**


	7. A long day

**Disclaimer: I don't own TVD, even though I'd love to!**

* * *

><p>I yawned ridiculously loudly as I walked down the school hallway. I had absolutely no idea how I'd get through the day, but staying home wasn't an option. I needed to be around people, I wanted to get back to my normal life, to my everyday routine. Anything to get my thoughts away from immortal mothers, lost fathers, lying boyfriends, and doppelgangers.<p>

"Well, you don't look good," Caroline said falling in step with me. I hugged the books tighter in my arms, and shrugged.

"I didn't get much sleep last night," that wasn't a lie, right? What with the restlessness, and then the talking… it was way after 5 that I had managed to fall asleep.

"Were you doing something… interesting?" she asked wiggling her eyebrows, and I chuckled, shaking my head from side to side.

"No!" I exclaimed, as my cheeks started burning. Damn it. I hadn't done anything. Sure, Damon had spent the night with me, but that wasn't the first time we were sharing a bed. And we had both kept our hands to ourselves, so… it hadn't meant anything, had it? "Who would I be doing something interesting with, anyway?"

"I don't know…let me think…." she trailed, taping her index finger against her cheek. I eyed her warily. Caroline was smarter than anyone gave her credit for. Could she have figured it out? God, no. She had every reason to hate Damon. She would be pissed at me. "You do seem to be spending a dangerous amount of time with Damon these days." Damn.

"Caroline," I breathed softly, standing in front of her. I was expecting to have this talk with her sooner, or later. It would be hard. But I had to get it over with.

"Hey, the guy was awful to me," she said facing me, and flicking her hair behind her shoulders "He was a complete d-bag, and I don't even know why I let him treat me like a skank, anyway."

"Caroline…"

"But," she interrupted me again "he's not like that with you," I raised both of my eyebrows in surprise "Not anymore. Not ever, maybe. I don't know. Damon has been there for you ever since Stefan… well, you know… and from what you've told me, he's been... nice, and aside from the occasional flirting, which let's face it, is just in his DNA, he hasn't tried anything. Do I find it hard to believe? Yes, but... that's just how it seems. What I am trying to say is," she inhaled deeply, and looked me square in the eye "if you're okay with it, I'm okay, too. I got your back. But you have to be careful, Elena, because I don't really trust _him_, okay?"

"Okay," I nodded, still too dumbfounded by her supporting speech. I was honestly expecting her to give me the cold shoulder.

"We should double date," Caroline suggested as she linked our arms and resumed walking towards the classroom. "You know, me, and Matt, you, and Damon. We're all exes, so we could… you know," she shrugged her shoulders "give useful tips to each other."

"Caroline, we aren't even dating," I pointed out, and she laughed.

"Yeah, right." Did she think I was joking?

"Seriously, we're just friends," I stressed. Officially, we were.

"So, you're telling me that all of his bad brother glory just doesn't do it for you? The piercing blue eyes, the perfect muscles, the sexy smirks? Nothing? Come on!"

"Yes," I replied in a small voice, without meeting her gaze.

"It's you, and me, Elena, you can tell me the truth." I sighed as we came at a halt outside the Geometry class. Was I attracted at Damon? Well, who wouldn't gawk at his gorgeous body, given the chance? But there was more… it wasn't just his looks that I admired. Not really. It was his personality. His ability to make a joke out of everything, but also be serious when he needed to. And even that mask. That mask he liked putting on, that mask that I would love to take off his face, and just stare deep into his so~…. Oh God. Maybe Caroline was right, after all.

"Okay, maybe I am," I admitted in a defeated voice, leaning against the wall, and a wide smile formed on Caroline's lips. She shouldn't be excited about this. It wasn't good. It was an announced disaster. "But only a little," I amended "and regardless, neither one of us is looking for a new relationship right now."

"Elena," she grabbed my forearms "this is the 21st century. Ever heard of friends with benefits?" she smirked evilly and I frowned in confusion.

"Friends with bene- Oh my God, Caroline!" I cried out in surprise, covering my face with my free hand. The images that had started forming in my head… How would I ever take them out? "That's enough, end of discussion," I stated firmly, moving out of her grasp.

"Suit yourself," she replied grinning evilly "but if it comes to you two being together, like… together- together, and you need to spice things up… I'm your person! All right?"

"Yeah, whatever," I whispered, entering the classroom with the picture of Damon's ruffled sheets burning in my brain.

* * *

><p>By the end of 8th period, I could feel my head throbbing, and my eye-lids closing, despite my feeble attempts to pay attention to whatever the teacher was saying. I found myself regretting my decision to come to school. If I had faked feeling sick, I'm sure Jenna would have tucked me into bed herself. I hastily pushed my chair backwards and stood up, gathering notebooks and pens from the desk, and all but shoving them into my bag. I was halfway across the classroom, when Alaric called my name, making my shoulders slump in disappointment.<p>

"Elena, can we talk for a second?" I turned around, sighing, and managing to put a weak smile on my face.

"Sure," I replied, sitting down on one of the desks of the front row, while he closed the door.

"How are you doing?" Alaric asked in a soft voice, reapproaching me, and crossing his arms in front of his chest. I shrugged.

"Trying to process everything, but I'll probably need some time before I can fully accept that my birth mother is in fact a vampire." He winced at my words, and as the silence stretched between us, I took a closer look at his face. He looked pretty beaten up, dark circles under his eyes, and features pulled in a tight grimace. I guess going to sleep, after you've just come back from the dead, isn't easy, either.

"I know, it's been hard for me, too," he whispered staring out of the window thoughtfully "but there's something that I can't understand, Elena," his gaze fixed on me "You know what Damon is, you know what he has done," I licked my lips, preparing to have this conversation for what felt like the hundredth time. It didn't matter that it was with a different person. Everyone always assumed the same things for Damon. The same bad things. "He's not a good guy, Elena. It's not safe to be around him."

"Listen, Alaric, I don't expect you to understand my relationship with Damon. And that's okay, because in your mind he's the crazy vampire that killed your wife, but... You don't know him like I do. He's been there for me, and I trust him. He can be reckless, and stubborn. And he _is_ dangerous. I know that. He killed you yesterday, just because he felt threatened. He acted on pure impulse, but…we got lucky, because you have your ring, and you lived to tell the tale. But, Damon... he's changing. Baby steps, but he _really_ is." The look on his face was one of confusion, mixed with revulsion. "He's not the man he was just a few months ago, and I want to give him a second chance. Everyone deserves a second chance."

"He turned Isobel into a monster, Elena," he said through clenched teeth, and I nodded.

"That's what I was thinking yesterday, too. But, Alaric… _Isobel_ asked him to turn her. _She_ wanted to be a vampire," I clarified, and sadness filled his eyes. He ran his hands through his hair.

"I just can't understand why she would want a life like that," he whispered. I chuckled.

"Yeah, I'm afraid I can't really help you with that one. I might be hanging out with a vampire, but I can't exactly see the appeal in being one. And I haven't even met Isobel. I could hardly know how her brain works." A small smile crept on his lips, and he shook his head.

"However, I didn't want to talk to you about that. I made a copy of a paper Jeremy wrote for me," he reached back and grabbed something from his bag "I think you should take a look at it." I curiously glanced at the papers he handed me. Why would Alaric want to talk to me about Jer's proj-… My eyes widened when I read the title _Fact or fiction: The truth about vampires in Mystic Falls._

"Jeremy wrote this?" I breathed handing it back to him. How had this happened? Hadn't the compulsion worked?

"It's very clear that he didn't think it was real," he tried to comfort me. I took a deep breath, but it didn't calm me down. Could Jeremy know? Was this why he was so distant? Or was I just imagining things?

"I really hope you're right, because I've done so much to protect him from all of this."

"So, how do you deal with it?" I frowned.

"What do you mean?" I asked, and he shrugged.

"With all the lies, and the secrets. You have to lie to everyone, who's important to you."

"It's not safe for them to know the truth," he cocked his head to the side as if he didn't fully agree with me "So, yes, I keep it from them, but it's only because I love them," I said, and he nodded.

* * *

><p>"Stupid, stupid phone. Stop," I mumbled in my sleep, grabbing the pillow and placing it over my head. The drilling sound of my ring-tone went on, and on, and I pushed my head harder against the mattress. <em>Who is so damn persistent<em>, I wondered to myself as it went off again. With my eyes still closed, I threw one arm out of the covers, and started blindly searching for the device that as far as I remembered was somewhere on the nightstand. I heard a loud thud, as the clock slipped off the table, and hit the floor. Cursing under my breath, I finally wrapped my fingers around the phone, and pressed the accept button.

"Elena!" Caroline's high pitched voice shrieked, making my ear drum hurt, and grimacing, I held the phone a good distance away from my ear.

"Ugh, this better be good," I grumbled in response, rolling on my back, and throwing one arm over my forehead.

"You were sleeping?"

"Key word: _were_."

"Oh, so you're up!" Caroline exclaimed happily and I groaned. "I need you to get out of that house, and come at the Grill.'

"Why?" I complained, ducking once again under the covers. It was warm there. Warm, and comfortable and relaxing. I would do anything to get a few more hours of alone time with my bed. But of course, Caroline was… Caroline.

"Be here in twenty minutes, Elena!" she ordered, and hang up.

* * *

><p>I chuckled as I entered the Grill and spotted Caroline. She was sitting on a booth, her hands clasped beneath her chin, a dreamy look in her eyes as she followed with her gaze Matt around the room. It was nice seeing them together. They were two of my closest friends, and I wanted them to be happy.<p>

"Enjoying the view?" I greeted her happily, taking a seat next to her. Caroline jumped in surprise, and blushed.

"I was staring, wasn't I?" she asked horrified, taking a long sip of water.

"Totally," I nodded "But, hey, it's normal! You're in love, you're supposed to act like that," I squeezed her arm comfortingly, and she narrowed her eyes at me.

"Talking from personal experience, Elena?" she asked suggestively, and I rolled my eyes. Not that again.

"I'm not in love with Damon, Care."

"I'm not saying you're in love with him. I'm saying you got the hots for him." she stated.

"We are just friends! Who are you, match-dot-com? Why do you even care so much?"

"Ugh, because you like him, and you're too thick to realise it by yourself. Damon might not be my favourite person, but he's obviously yours, so get on with it! Get laid!" she cried out in exasperation "I promise you, he's the best sex you'll ever have!"

"My sexual life is just fine, thank you," I murmured, choosing not to mention the PG-17 dreams I'd been having lately.

"Fine as in nonexistent!" she whined "He likes you. You like him. And that equals…"

"Sex, I know! But not in our case. No way."

"Ugh, Elena, you are just… UGH," she said seriously, and I chuckled.

Before I had the chance to say anything else, however, a figure that was approaching us caught my attention. I sat up straighter, when I realised that it was Bonnie. We hadn't talked in many days. Whenever I'd try to get near her, she'd walk the other way. She never even bothered looking at me. Caroline smiled at me uneasily and waved at Bonnie.

"Hey," Bonnie said in a small voice sitting across the table.

"Hi," I breathed, instinctively crossing my arms. She bit down on her lip nervously. This wasn't her idea. This was all Caroline's doing. Caroline's, who was currently failing in holding back her proud smile. I couldn't blame her for trying to help us, but somehow I doubted it would work.

"So, are we going to get something to eat?" Caroline proposed, glancing from me to Bonnie.

"Yeah, I'll just have a burger, and some fries," I mumbled staring down at the wooden table.

"I'll take a Caesar's salad," Bonnie added.

"Okay, then I'll just go give our order, and I'll be back in a while." With that, Caroline stood up, and left us alone. _Subtle_, I mentally commented, as I glanced around the room, making sure that my gaze wouldn't fall on Bonnie. I was being stubborn, I knew that. But I just didn't want to be the one to start the conversation.

"So, how have you been?" she eventually asked, breaking the awkward silence that had fallen between us.

"You know, I'm dealing. You?"

"Same old, same old," she replied, playing with her napkin. I nodded silently, uncrossing my arms, and removing my jacket. It was getting too hot in there. Or maybe I was getting too worked up by the memories of our fight.

When Caroline sat back next to me, she had an expression of pure disbelief on her face. "Come on, girls! You've been friends since kindergarten, and you've never had a single fight. What the hell brought this up? I mean... one day you were inseparable, and the next one you can't even look at each other." I sighed, resting my elbows against the table and glancing at Bonnie from the corner of my eye. We both knew that we couldn't exactly explain her what had happened.

"Seriously?" Caroline shrieked, and if the waiter hadn't come at that moment, I'm pretty sure she'd had given us a speech about how we can't ruin our friendship for a silly reason, after everything we'd been through together. Maybe Caroline had a point. Perhaps we could mend things between us. Yes, we could. If we were still the same people as a few years ago. The same Bonnie and Elena who had gone together through primary, and almost all the way through high school. The same Bonnie and Elena who had stayed up all night talking about their crushes, and who had ditched Physics to go shopping. But we weren't. Bonnie wasn't being the Bonnie I'd known my entire life, anymore. She was acting like a very narrow-minded, judgy person. I didn't like that. Not one bit.

"So, the Founder's Court is in a few days, and they announced it today," Caroline spoke up as she picked on her food.

"The Founder's Court?" I asked confusion colouring my voice. Yes, it was another town event, but why was it so important?

"Yeah, you know Miss Mystic Falls," she trailed, giving me time to understand. Oh. Right. The beauty pageant of the town. The one my mom had been talking about since I was five. "They announced it today, and you, and I are both on it."

"Oh my God, we signed for this so long ago. I completely forgot," I mumbled, putting down my fork. It felt surreal. When I had applied for that thing, my parents were still alive, I was still dating Matt, and I wholeheartedly believed that humans were the only mentally developed creatures on earth. I was basically a completely different person.

"So, are you dropping out, then?" she asked not even bothering with trying to hide her joy. I smiled sadly. Typical Caroline.

"I can't," I breathed resting back on the chair, and meeting Bonnie's sympathetic gaze.

"Her mom is the one who wanted her into this," Bonnie explained softly, and Caroline winced.

"Oh, I didn't know that. But, on the bright side," she looked at me pointedly "since you'll definitely need an escort, I think that this might be the perfect chance for you to finally deal with your feelings about _someone_."

"Caroline," I shook my head warningly.

"What feelings?" Bonnie asked quickly, the gentleness leaving her face "feelings about who?"

"Well, you know how our dear friend, Elena, has been spending a lot of time with…"

"Caroline," I whispered again, touching her shoulder, trying to make her stop. There was no way this was going to end well. Damon was the reason me and Bonnie had argued in the first place. If she found out I was still seeing him, and more importantly, liked him more than just as a friend, she'd be furious. We'd be just adding more fuel to the fire. No, no. This was going to be a disaster.

"Hey, Bonnie is your friend, she'll understand," Caroline replied, patting my knee. "So, Elena and _Damon_ have come very close, and I know we thought that he was an A class jerk, but I think Elena has got him pretty smitten. So, I told her, that she may think they're just friends, but I'm, like, more than a hundred percent sure that they're going to end up together. And I know we don't trust Damon, but Elena is trustworthy and cautious enough for the both of them. Right?"

"Caroline, what are you talking about?" Bonnie spat out angrily "have you completely forgotten what he did to you? How he called you a shallow stupid waste of space?" tears gathered in Caroline's eyes at those words. I leaned forward and glared across the table at Bonnie.

"Bonnie, stop it, you're hurting her," I whispered.

"I'm not the one who hurt her, Elena, _he_ is, Damon is. He is always the reason things go wrong. If you keep acting so childishly, you are just going to end up like Caroline, too. Picked on and insecure!" she snapped at me. Caroline huffed in disbelief and stood up abruptly, storming away without another glance at either one of us.

"Are you even listening to yourself? And I'm sorry, how am I being childish?" I asked involuntarily raising my voice. First Caroline and now I was being immature, too? Seriously?

"Listen, Elena, I know that you thought that you loved Stefan, and that it hurt that he left you. But spending time with his _screwed up_ brother, will not bring Stefan back. And you shouldn't even want him back. We've been through this, before. Stefan and Damon are not good for you. They are not good for anyone. Why don't you get it?" This was stupid, and so far away from the truth.

"Do you really believe what you're saying?"

"Yes, Elena, I believe that you can't handle Stefan's absence from your life, and that's why you're clinging onto Damon." I felt like laughing. This was ridiculous.

I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but words just escaped me at that moment.

"See, I'm right," she added, mistaking my lack of response for admittance. The legs of my chair screeched against the floor as I sat up, and rushed towards the bathroom. I gasped audibly when I found another person already in there, but when I realized it was Caroline, I sighed tiredly and imitated her position. We stood there, leaning against the sink, taking deep breaths, not one word leaving our lips. After all these years, how could Bonnie know me so little? Did she honestly think I was going to be one of those girls that desperately hold onto their exes as if life itself depended on it? I didn't hang out with Damon because he was Stefan's brother. I couldn't care less about Stefan. I wanted nothing to do with him. He had lied to me. Bonnie knew how much I hate lies. She should be able to tell that if anything, I wanted to forget everything about Stefan.

"I don't believe she actually said that," I finally said aloud.

"I know," Caroline replied in a trembling voice.

"Hey, are you okay?" I asked wrapping my arm around her shoulders. They were shaking ever so slightly, and her chin was trembling. Damn, Bonnie. Why did she have to make Care feel bad? She had only been trying to be a good friend, to both of us.

"Yeah, I guess," she sniffed "I just didn't expect her to throw those words on my face like that. I am with Matt now, and I am happy. I do my best not to think about Damon, because honestly it still hurts. He wasn't nice. But… I like being in this bubble where I don't have to think about him, you know?"

"I know, Caroline, I'm sorry."

She nodded, and wiped her face with the back of her hand.

"I look horrible," she groaned, turning around to stare at her reflection on the mirror.

"You look fine," I reassured her, and practically dragged her out of the bathroom.

"Just tell me if you spot Matt. I don't want him to see me like this. I'm ugly." She pouted.

"You're not ugly, Caroline." I rolled my eyes.

I gasped when someone's hand grabbed my forearm, making me come to an abrupt halt. "Katherine," my breath hitched on my throat at the familiar name. I struggled to stay calm, telling myself that surely, it was just a coincidence. I took in the man that had spoken. He was tall, dark haired and with a beard. Nothing that stood out. Nothing that gave out whether he was a vampire or not. Not that they usually wore an "I'm a vampire" badge, or anything.

"I'm sorry, you have the wrong person," I whispered, trying not to panic. Who was I kidding? I had panicked the moment he had touched me. Now I was simply struggling not to show it. He had to be a vampire. There was no other way he could know of Katherine. He was a vampire. And an old one at that. Why was he in Mystic Falls?

"Elena, come on," Caroline urged me, a hint of worry in her voice.

"My mistake," the man apologised, slowly letting go of me.

I pulled off a weak smile, and then quickly walked back towards our table, Caroline right behind me. I needed some water. I needed some air. There was a good chance I was freaking out for no reason. But if I had learned anything during my few months in the vampire world, it was that there were no coincidences. That vampire hadn't just happened to walk in Mystic Falls. Was he looking for Katherine? Could he be looking for me? No, why would he do that? But even the mere thought of another vampire, apart from Damon, in our city made me very, very uncomfortable.

"Elena," Bonnie said softly, and I started looking towards her, when another voice called my name. This one wasn't coming from our table, though. No, this one was Damon's. I frowned as I turned to my side to look at him. He looked weird. Well, physically he was just fine, but his expression was wrong.

"We've got a problem," he announced quietly, his eyes full of anger and… fear? "and by problem, I mean global crisis." I shot up from my chair as he started gathering my stuff, and stared at him with my mouth open. What was he talking about? Had he seen me with that man? Or was this about something else entirely?

"I'm out of here," Bonnie growled through clenched teeth, and when I glanced over my shoulder, she was already walking away.

"Bonnie," Caroline yelled, and then looking at me apologetically added "I'll go with her. We'll talk later, okay?" I wanted to scream at everyone to stop. But everything kept going at the same insane speed.

I nodded wordlessly, running after Damon who was already halfway across the room.

"Damon, wait up!" I shouted, grabbing his arm, and forcing him to look at me. "Hey, what's going on?"

"Not here," he muttered, tossing me my jacket, and taking my wrist into his hand.

* * *

><p>The drive to my house was shorter than I ever thought possible, and I'm sure that if it wasn't for Damon's vampire reflexes, we would have died in a horrible car accident. I had never before seen him so reeled up. His hands were clenching so hard on the wheel that his knuckles had turned white.<p>

"Just spit it out, Damon. Purge," I muttered under my breath as he turned on the lights in my room, and I sat down on the edge of the bed.

"You are starting to sound an awful lot like me. And I don't mean that in a good way," he pointed out, taking his usual spot on the window seat.

"I know, it worries me, too," I rolled my eyes "but I'm pretty sure it wasn't the topic you had in mind for discussion when you barged into the Grill."

"I haven't barged in anywhere. I... _made an entrance_. I don't do barging. Not my style."

"And I don't do patience, lately, so you either tell me what happened, or _I_ am going to start talking. And you're not going to like what I have to say."

Damon nodded, and ran a hand through his already messy hair.

"The tomb was opened, and all the tomb vampires are now free." Yes, that was the sound of my jaw dropping on the floor.

"What?" I blurted out.

"Here comes the history lesson," he said resting his head against the wall. "Back in 1864, Katherine had a friend, Pearl. She was trapped with the rest of the vampires inside the tomb, when the council raided the city, but her daughter, Annabelle, was never caught. _Anna_, as she goes by now, came back to Mystic Falls, knowing about the tomb, _and_ the Bennet crystal. She watched me screw up every chance to open that tomb and _then_, she found out that there was another way to get in there. She got a witch to do the spell for her, and she got her mommy back. And that leaves us with a tough nut to crack."

"Wait, so, you're saying Katherine is out there now?" I asked, shivering at the thought.

"I'm saying twenty seven starving vampires are now on the loose. And as it turns out, Katherine was never into that tomb."

"How? I mean… she was taken away, wasn't she?"

"Katherine has her ways, I guess," he shrugged his shoulders indifferently. But his eyes told a different story. He was nowhere near okay with everything. He was just covering it up. "She pulled some strings, raised her petticoat and got someone saving her pretty ass." His voice was dripping with sarcasm.

"There was a man at the Grill earlier," I whispered, knowing that he would be able to hear me "he called me Katherine." His eyes shot up at me.

"And?"

"He just apologised, and let go of me. I'd almost swear he was a vampire, Damon."

He stayed silent for the next minutes, standing up to slowly pace towards me.

"Damon," I breathed, wrapping my fingers around his wrist. His eyes opened, and instantly met mine.

"What do you think they were doing at the Grill, Elena? Why haven't they just fed and taken off?" he said with a frown etched on his forehead. I gulped down. I knew what he was trying to say, of course I did. But hearing it from him made it more real. "If they're still here, it means they want revenge. Revenge on those who stole their lives, their homes."

"The founding families," I whispered, and he nodded. "But we are not the same people. No one even knows about them, and even if we knew, we aren't responsible for what happened in 1864. It's a different century, now!"

"Vampires don't care about that, Elena. Time means nothing to us. We want revenge, we take revenge. This is how we are. "Damon sighed. "Things in Mystic Falls are about to get bloody."

"I'm the first person they'll come after," I mumbled quietly. His jaw clenched. "Even if it's just out of curiosity, just to see why I look like her."

"Well, look at that," he chuckled "is this my turn to save you, now?"

"It's not just me, Damon," I replied, shaking my head from side to side. I appreciated his humour, but we had to be serious about this. Lives were in danger. "They'll be after all of the founding families. Jeremy, Caroline, and her mother, Mayor Lockwood, and his family, they're all in danger," I whispered, the dangerousness of the situation finally sinking in.

"Hey," he said firmly grabbing my shoulder, and bending his waist to stare down at me. "They've spent the last century underground, with no blood, and no contact whatsoever with the real world. This gives us an advantage. They will need time to regroup, and fit in. We can use that time to come up with a kick ass plan. It's global crisis, but we can deal with it." I nodded, even though I couldn't exactly share his optimism. He was strong, no doubt. But he was on his own. I didn't know much about vampire strength, but I was pretty sure that the saying "strength in numbers" applied even to their race.

I couldn't help but raise my eyebrows in confusion when Damon reached into his pocket.

The fingers of his right hand were clasped tightly together, hiding whatever he didn't want me to see. The hesitation was clear in his stance. He bit down on his lip thoughtfully, eyebrows furrowed.

"Remember how your ancestors grabbed their pitchforks and went after the vampires?" I nodded. "Well, they used _this_ to find them."

"But this is Jeremy's pocket watch, how did you get it?" I asked in surprise, when he placed the old device on my nightstand.

"That sad excuse of a reporter had it on him the night Vicky killed him," he shrugged "I took it."

"Logan?" I picked it up carefully, and gently pulled off the lid. "Oh, what happened to it?" I asked sadly, as I traced with the tips of my fingers the once valuable antique. Jeremy would be furious if he found out it had been ruined. Come to think about it, how had Jeremy let it out of his sight, anyway? Except if maybe Logan had sneaked into Jer's room, and stolen it.

"It's not a watch, Elena. It's a compass… and... what do you think it points at?" He blurred across the room, and my eyes widened as the needle started spinning wildly. Until it was pointing straight at Damon. Oh God. That was how the founding families had rounded up the vampires. That's what the compass pointed at. Vampires.

On the wrong hands this could be murderous.

_Well, then we have to make sure it will never fall on wrong hands, _I thought to myself, as Damon slipped the compass back into his pocket, staring at me pointedly.

He was older, and craftier. He'd be able to hide it better than me. No objection there.

* * *

><p><strong>Well, hello, you amazing readers! <strong>

**I hope you're all safe and feeling good!**

**I'd like to thank you all for your support, either if it's just by following/favoriting this story, or by leaving a review. It means a lot to me reading your thoughts, so keep that in mind! ;)**

**Over the last few days my muse has come out of hibernation. Well, actually both my _Learning To Love Again_ and _You Can Never Be Sure _muses have awakened. I am planning to grab this opportunity, and work on some new chapters, hopefully for both stories. I've actually already almost finished a chapter for YCNBS, but it needs to be edited, and then beta-ed, etc. **

**The point is, I want to focus on the actual writing part for the moment, so, the next LTLA update will come during the first weekend of December. **

**I hope you'll all still be with me till then. **

**P.S. A big 'thank you' goes to my awesome beta Grace4Delena . She has been super patient with me! Do me a favor, and go read her one-shots! They will give you the _best_ insight into the wonderful character that is Damon Salvatore. Go!**

**You can follow me on twitter: ts_eirini**

**Take care of yourselves,**

**Eirini.**


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